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07.10.08, 11:09 AM General Topics
41 replies
I have a question for new moms- I have a dd, 9 mos old, working full time- 3 days out, 2 days from home, and have not been able to make the "me" time I see all of my friends able to do for themselves- how do you do it? My DH is never home at a certain time- owns own law firm, so varies from 6 to 8, and I need to take care of myself, physically (going to gym) and emotionally (dont feel like me anymore, only Sassy's mom). Any tips? Thanks! [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.10.08, 11:09 AM Flag
 

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Get a sitter for a few hours a week. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:10 AM Flag
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your dd's name is Sassy? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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Her nickname- [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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nn for what? just curious - it is cute. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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Sarah- she has two nicknames- Sassafras and Sassy- she just looks like a Sassy. She has this little half grin that makes you melt- she will walk all over us, I know it! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:15 AM Flag
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I know a Sarah called Sassy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:15 AM Flag
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It is a good nickname for Sarah, because there is not much else you can do with Sarah. Sa? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:17 AM Flag
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Sally is cute [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:22 AM Flag
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with a nickname like sassy, i think she will. but i wouldn't say that with any kind of pride or amusement. i'd say it with embarrassment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:17 AM Flag
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seriously - what kind of parent looks forward to their child "walking all over them"? You're asking for it, Sassy's mom... good luck to you all [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:17 AM Flag
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Well, at 9 months, she can do all the walking she wants. We will worry about that in a few years- and I really dont think nicknames have much effect on the childs behavior, signed, a former "Tomato". [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:19 AM Flag
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np. Ouch that's nasty [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:19 AM Flag
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my cheeks would get all red when I was little, like a tomato; it stuck, and never bothered me. And I am not looking forward to her "walking all over us"; gees, you cant say anything on here like that on here! It is like saying she will be a heartbreaker and getting flamed for raising a future bitch! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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nah - you'd just be flamed for bragging about your child's looks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:22 AM Flag
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lol! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:25 AM Flag
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I like Sassy, and I think nick names are great. My dd is Brynn my husband in Benjamin so when she acts like her dad (bad) I call her Brynnjamin. haha just a joke and i think it is funny. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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or: i seriously did not mean to be nasty. but people are always letting things go and being amused by things when kids are little. then, suddenly the child is 3 y .o. and they act like they've been dealt this bad hand of cards b/c their child has terrible behavior. it all starts somewhere. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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OP: We are pretty strict on our parenting ideas, I guess you could say. My nieces and nephews use the words Excuse me, please, ask to to be excused from the table, etc. and we intend to do the same. I hate when I see kids who are rude or animals, and the parents just kind of excuse it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:24 AM Flag
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good for you... I just hope your dd doesnt let her nn or your thoughts about her smile go to her head! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:25 AM Flag
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True! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:25 AM Flag
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come on people, can't you just help the OP with her original question? Why would you offer unsolicited criticism of the nickname of her child? This is another woman asking for help and that is all you can respond to? Remember how tough it was for that first year? Why not be supportive? You no nothing about her undoubtedly lovely child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:27 AM Flag
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OP: Thank you! I want to know how do people do it with the guilt and time management! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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very cute name! Could you go to the gym on weekends when your husband is there? Or early in the morning before dd wakes up (with husband there, of course:)Or even at night after husband gets home Or get the babysitter to stay for a couple of extra hours on an occasional weeknight? You really should make time for yourself and don't feel guilty about it. You will be a better mom for your dd if you are happy and healthy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:17 AM Flag
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you need two things. 1. a housekeeper, even once a week will do. 2. a regular babysitter/nanny/au pair even if you get only 3 hours a day to go to the gym, get your nails done, have a relaxing lunch, it will make all the difference in the world. You will be happy and dh will be happy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:18 AM Flag
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ita [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:23 AM Flag
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you sound so entitled - not everyone can afford a housekeeper weekly, or a regular babysitter/nanny so they can go get their nails done! I agree that OP should try and get some help for some "me time" but you are over the top! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:24 AM Flag
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she works, she dh works, this is what she needs to actually feel good about herself. My housekeeper is $100 a week and when I was a SAHM and only needed a couple of hours here and there I was able to find someone for $10p/h. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:27 AM Flag
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wow, you pay $100 a week for your housekeeper? I pay $80 and she's fabulous, only every other week, and I barely need to clean on the off weeek [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:30 AM Flag
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Nobody must be in your house during the day! - what on earth do you do with your kids? I have 4 dcs & one hour after they are home the house is a disaster! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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Well, I have a 4yo and an 19mo, and we're home most of the time... I guess we're just neat. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:35 AM Flag
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hmmm, or you are standing on top of your dcs cleaning up after them - doesn't do much for their fantasy play :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:37 AM Flag
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nope, not at all. We just do the cleanup song about 5 times before bed with my 4yo for toys, etc, and I clean the kitchen once a week inbetween housekeeper visits [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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OP: I work out of the house 3 days and get home after 6 with her, so those days would not work to have that free time, and the two days from home I cant get that either- I mean how do you manage it? Does anyone feel guilty being away for that time and then wanting more to have a glass of wine with friends instead of being with your dd and dh? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:27 AM Flag
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No, everyone needs time to themselves. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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I totally feel your pain. I try to plan one night a month at least to my self or with friends, sure my dh do things wothout dd throughout the month but that one night is dd and daddy time. I have a group of girls and we do a book club meet once a month at a resteraunt and have our drinks, gossip and talk about the book. it is fun! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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This is what I mean- going to the gym once a week is not going to help with the rest of the baby weight, but when I get home I just want to spend time with her and then when DH gets home, be with him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:34 AM Flag
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I walk/run with dd. I get home change and get her in the jogger stroller and we walk/run to the park play for a bit then i walk/run back. I am doing ww at work and run/walk with dd every other day. She loves it so do i and then I feel better about myself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:37 AM Flag
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^^oh and i have lost 12 lbs in 8 weeks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:39 AM Flag
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good for you! I am doing ww but I am bfing, and have not lost a pound- so much for the myth that bfing helps you lose weight! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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that is such a good point, it is also very important for the kids to have time with just dad, you should never feel guilty about that. Can a friend come stay with dd for an afternoon? or any relatives near-by? I even found that I could have some me time in the house after my ds went to sleep--take a long bath with a glass of wine, or read a trashy magazine, I know it is not the same as getting out which you also must do but it might help. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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You are early in on the mom process & still sorting things out. I found it much easier to have friends come to me so wouldn't have to bother w/babysitters & since you have such a little one she can sleep right thru your lunchs & dinners so long as you time them around naps/bedtime. But as for getting completely out of the house you need to schedule one hour for gym one one of your work days & one hour for nails/errands on the other one & eat lunch at your desk. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 11:36 AM Flag
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