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07.09.08, 11:31 AM General Topics
10 replies
I need some help with an awkward situation. Tomorrow is my birthday, and my father would like to take me and my dh out to dinner sometime in the next few days. That's fine, but here is the problem: He would also like to have his girlfriend there or have her babysit my dd. His girlfriend is one of my least favorite people in the world (religious freak who calls my faith into question, manipulative on many fronts, hunted down my dad 5 mths after my mom's death, etc.). He knows this is a very awkward situation for me, but if I say no, then he has me being the "bad guy" instead of seeing how this woman has treated me and my family. Should I just grin and bare it like I do any other time she is around, or do I get to say that I don't have to spend my birthday with someone who makes me this uncomfortable. By the way, my mom's unexpected and sudden death 2.5 years ago makes my birthday a slightly sad day for me. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.09.08, 11:31 AM Flag
 

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don't go on your actual birthday, and then grin and bear it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:33 AM Flag
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yes, go out (you dont have to talk or listen to her) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:34 AM Flag
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Could you suggest a lunch or dinner with just you and your dad? Tell him it would be fun to have some time together? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:35 AM Flag
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^^^ sorry. I meant "bear it" not "bare it" although it may not have been much of a slip considering how vulnerable this situation makes me feel. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:35 AM Flag
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i would rather have dinner with her than have her sit for my kids if i had to choose but you sound fairly grown up why not just stand your ground and say no to all of the above? i don't have enough spare time to be wasting it with people whose company i find repulsive and abusive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:37 AM Flag
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This is honestly how I feel. I don't have enough time to spend with all the people I love and adore let alone carve out time for someone who makes my skin crawl. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:41 AM Flag
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np: I disagree. This is her father we're talking about, not just some friend with an obnoxious girlfriend. She doesn't have to like the girlfriend (though obviously her father is hoping things will improve between them) but her father may not be around forever, and she shouldn't give up a chance to spend time with him just b/c she doesn't like his gf. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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I guess it just ticks me off that he would even think she should come around. She is just his girlfriend, not his wife or fiance. My brother isn't bringing his current girlfriend (who I actually really like). I feel like my dad is just being self-centered. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:45 AM Flag
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Unfortunately (for you) it sounds like your dad really likes this woman. I think you need to "suck it up" and spend some time with her, if it means spending time with your dad. It would probably be easier to do dinner with her than to have her with your kid. Just drink lots of wine at dinner - it's your birthday, you should be able to get drunk! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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I guess so. It would be much easier if she hadn't been such a jerk to me for the last 2 years. I've invited her to several dinners, glasses of wine here and there, and she won't come. Now that it's my birthday, she is willing to come. I don't really get it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:50 AM Flag
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