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07.08.08, 18:04 PM General Topics
50 replies
19 m/o is totally destroying the dining table (throwing hard objects--like dvd player--at it, nicking the surface.) do i have to refinish the entire table in order to repair it, or can you spot-fill it with filler or something? it's a solid walnut table. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.08.08, 06:04 PM Flag
 

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uh. why is dc throwing dvd players? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:04 PM Flag
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she is totally naughty. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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^^ i'm giving her a full-on time out right now, she's screaming her head off. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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I'm not trying to be sanctimommy here, but if your 19 month old is still up @ 9 PM, that may explain why she is naughty [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:06 PM Flag
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her hours are 10 to 10. she gets a full 12 hours. she's like this all day long. i'm serious. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:07 PM Flag
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Then maybe you ought to DISCIPLINE her? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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oh, believe me, we do. she is in her crib right now, and i'm leaving her there until she cries herself to sleep. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:10 PM Flag
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Wow. THAT'LL teach her! Next maybe we could send you to Iraq to fire some cotton balls at those darn insurgents! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:12 PM Flag
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ok, so what is your description of discipline, then?? we already pointed out the damage, put her dvd player way up high, took her off the table, scolded her...now she is in time out / being put to bed at the same time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:14 PM Flag
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Smack her in the ass. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:14 PM Flag
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ITTTA. A 19-month-old understands NONE of what you did. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:15 PM Flag
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I have to agree w/you. I read OP's response and thought "how does she think any of this made sense to her dc?" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:15 PM Flag
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i didn't mention--for fear of being flamed--i spank her hard on her hand when she does things like this. she does know...if she was on the ground, she'd run away from us to avoid being scolded and she knows when she does something bad bc she faux-slaps her hand when i don't. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:19 PM Flag
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Lovely. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:21 PM Flag
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time out and bed don't go together maybe she should go to bed before the meltdown! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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i already said, her bedtime is 10 to 10 (and she naps 1 or 2x during the day, so it's not too late for her.) she gets plenty of sleep. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:19 PM Flag
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Apparently, children do best when bedtime is somewhere in the 7-8 PM range, regardless of how many hours they sleep. I feel for you though. I have 19 mo too. Tough age. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 05:13 PM Flag
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^^just pretend we live in california, and we're doing fine on the time sched. sheesh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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I'll be the first to say I'm not an expert, but that seems like a tough schedule to me - mine slept from 6:30 PM until 7 AM at that age, with a 3 hr nap midday [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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why is it a tough sched? we go to sleep later, we wake up later, she gets her full nap in--like i said, pretend we live in california, and the math works out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:11 PM Flag
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np: Sure, sounds like it's working. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:12 PM Flag
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np: That is way too long a day for a toddler, even if she sleeps for 12 hours later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:08 PM Flag
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true, but perhaps you should put dvd players out of reach? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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it WAS out of reach. she climbed up onto the chair, then onto the table and grabbed dvd player and threw it when we told her to get off of the table. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:07 PM Flag
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not sure you can tell a 19 month old to get off the table - you need to redirect her (and actually move her) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:08 PM Flag
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not when you have your hands in the sink holding dirty pot at that moment. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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I'd drop the pot and redirect the kid [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:10 PM Flag
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believe me, i did...it was too late by the time i ran to the table. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:11 PM Flag
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relax she's at a tough age. wait till she old then fix the table. it's bond to happen again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:17 PM Flag
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thank you, you seem to be the only replier who is getting the picture--and my question was about the table. i didn't expect to have to defend myself about naptime, disciplining, where i store my stuff, why she has access to the dvd player, etc. man. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:21 PM Flag
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For the table- there are kits you can buy at most hardware stores or Gracious Home - they have wax and colored markers to match different woods [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:30 AM Flag
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Your db needs *attention* and *supervision* (can you wait till she's asleep to do the dishes, or have someone else do them?) Please don't hit her, abandon her in her crib to cry, etc. Please spend time playing and interacting playfully and lovingly with her (yeah, more time). She needs you. Don't worry about the table. Good luck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 12:07 AM Flag
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OP update: today, glass table tops came, i no longer have to worry abt the table. yesterday, i had an epiphany and realized that she does the naughty stuff when i'm busy doing other stuff and not interacting with her. i spent extra time purposefully playing and interacting w her yesterday and guess what?? she was an angel all day and went to sleep early!!!!!!! thx for the reply! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:11 AM Flag
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NP- YAAAY! That is seriously a wonderful, wonderful epiphany. I'm so glad you could get thru the neg responses you received & instead of being defensive, listened to the great advice up above. At that age (before 2 yrs) babies simply don't have the brain development to "remember" discipline so time outs don't "teach" them anything but not to trust you. You just have to be on top of them & redirect until they have the capacity to know "right" from "wrong" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:18 AM Flag
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That was me. I'm *so* happy to hear things are going well! Yea for a partnership approach to parenting-- it leaves *both* parties happier and more satisfied, and nurtures a close relationship you'll both be grateful for for years to come. It's easy to lose perspective about what's really important (positive feelings, shared experiences, etc.) Thanks for coming back to share your success... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 05:08 PM Flag
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Just reading up. Have 19 mo too. Was going to say she probably needs attention. Discipline is not effective at this age. The only things you can do is give attention, redirect attention and ignore when necessary (when the fits come). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 05:16 PM Flag
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That is exactly why we never bought the $10k table. When dd got duco cement on ours I was actually vindicated and happy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:06 PM Flag
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we got the designer table 7 years ago. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:08 PM Flag
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actually we did 2 yrs ago after 20 years of crap [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:15 PM Flag
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it sounds like it's time to have another baby to me! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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why is there a DVD player on your table? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:15 PM Flag
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and why does a 19 month old have her "own" dvd player? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:16 PM Flag
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it's our only dvd player. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:17 PM Flag
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because it's a surface that is taller than my child. unfortunately, we have a fearless climber with ultra-deft feet. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:16 PM Flag
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as the parent of a 19mo who loves to throw stuff (though thankfully it is mostly food. and milk/water), I totally understand and I'm totally sympathetic. to answer your question though -- it may be possible to "spot repair" a table but it will be better if the whole thing is refinished. depending on the number of "spots", I'd probably try spot repair first. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:25 PM Flag
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thx...only 2 repliers actually addressed the table, btw! i am getting glass tabletop protectors on thurs, and think i will just temporarily fill in the nicks w wood putty. will wait to refinish years later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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If you want to do this, get the Minwax stick or putty that matches the wood stain. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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thx! i have to do it tmrw, before the tops arrive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:32 PM Flag
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hey, on the off chance you come back -- one of the ways you fix dings (dents NOT scratches) in a wood table is to use your iron. You put water in the dent, let it get absorbed by the wood, then put an iron on a damp cloth on it. The heat causes the water to expand. This causes the wood fiber to pop back into shape. But you would probably need to refinish the table afterwards. If this is a good table, I'd just wait and have the top done by a pro. If it is a good table, DON'T use wood putty on it now. That stuff is like glue and will make many future repairs/refinishing harder/impossible. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 08:29 AM Flag
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