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07.08.08, 12:35 PM General Topics
28 replies
am i alone? i am a sahm of a 2yo dd. i feel tired all the time, irritable, hungry, and lately everything just seems overwhelming. i am overweight. i feel like i have no life. nothing is about me. i know that may be selfish but i want (just for a moment) someone to focus on me. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.08.08, 12:35 PM Flag
 

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its nt selfish. how is your relationship with the dad? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:35 PM Flag
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op: we get along very well but i do not feel like he thinks i am beautiful or is attracted to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:37 PM Flag
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are you married to him? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:39 PM Flag
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op: yes [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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you need to talk to him and get him to contribute to parenting, or getting some parttime help so you can have a little time for yourself. Seriously [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:45 PM Flag
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it is not like he doesn't contribute or won't give me time alone. i just feel like i need a whirlwind romance or a really exciting vacation. it has just been to long since something exciting has happened. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:50 PM Flag
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can you ask dh to go away together for a few days? might help you "recharge" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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op: we could but we would have to take dd [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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you don't have parents who could help? or a friend? even going away with dd wouldn't be too bad, a change of scenery can help, and if you go to a good resort you can get a babysitter [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:55 PM Flag
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are you married/living together? if so, you need to talk to him. you need a break adn he needs to do some parenting [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:40 PM Flag
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^btw, i am not pregnant [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:36 PM Flag
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It used to be like that for me. And I am sorry to say, that when you are a mother (woh or sah) you rarely get personal attention. Go on a retreat lady, and practice some self-care everyday! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:38 PM Flag
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get yourself a therapist. go weekly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:40 PM Flag
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Yes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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Go back to work, you will feel very useful, Your @YO will be going to preschool soon [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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np: for what it's worth, I am a full time WOHM and I feel the same way a lot of the time. although I have often thought if I could WOH part time and have full time help I would be happy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 02:04 PM Flag
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Bad advice. Then she'll be depressed and also super-stressed because of working. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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no, you're not alone. Time for a sitter, and if you can't afford that, join a gym that has daycare where you can put 2 yo, or put 2 yo in stroller and get out and exercise by walking or running. You have to focus on yourself and making yourself happy- it's not really fair to expect someone else to do that (unless you have a therapist. It's the therapist's job to focus on you :) ) Or find a new hobby (painting? gardening? reading novels?) that will help you get outside of your own head. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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you know what helped me, at least a little bit? i got a jogging stroller for DH and me (DH said he would go jogging with me at weekends, he started to jog) and that made me feel better. also, start having date nights/afternoons or whatever you can swing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:44 PM Flag
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op: dh and i were just looking at jogging strollers this weekend. i want to have date nights but we just moved to a new city (in SC) and don't know anyone. i just want my dh to tell me he thinks i am pretty sometimes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:47 PM Flag
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tell him, not us. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:49 PM Flag
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op: believe me i have. no response [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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sit him down and have a serious talk about how unhappy you are. and then get a sitter and go out, either with or without him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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no, I feel the same and just had another baby. when my husband leaves to work, I am so envious that he has another life and moments just for himself [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:45 PM Flag
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Well, considering I could have posted the exact same thing, you're definitely not alone! Definitely at least two of us. My vague plan is to sign up for an evening class, something not child-related, once a week I'll have somewhere to go. Not sure I'm actually going to do it, but that's the plan... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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You're losing your self-esteem and identity. An affair will only make you feel worse. Find a purpose to your life aside from being a mom and get passionate about something! Volunteer, get a job you love, start a business, get into a serious hobby, etc. You're probably not that interesting or exciting to your DH anymore...probably not fair, but it's a rut many SAHMs get into. If you're not sure where to start, go to the self help section of your local bookstore. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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You are me five months ago. start losing the weight - for yourself. i gained a lot of weight with my db and was shocked at how poorly I was treated by EVERYONE compared to before. It sucks - but it is the way life is. Invest in an elliptical (about $1000), join Weight Watchers online and just do it. I have only lost 20 lbs so far (I have about 25 more to go) but I am so much happier. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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You know PPD can onset at 2 years? It's actually not that uncommon. Do the same things you'd do ward it off with a newborn: Omega 3s, exercise that works your core, sunshine, contact with friends, therapy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 02:09 PM Flag
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