UrbanBaby

07.08.08, 08:40 AM New York City
10 replies

Spent two hours at a playdate this morning listening to two good friends argue over which is better to stay home or work - one works the other stays at home and the slinging and nasty arrows back and forth and their chosen lifestyle was very upsetting. Why can't people let other people do what is right for them and shut their mouths. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
New York City 07.08.08, 08:40 AM Flag

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itta. I don't feel that either way makes anyone a better mom. I know moms who work because they have to but other moms who work because they want to. I know sahm (like myself) who feel lucky to be able to stay at home and do lots with the kids (classes, playdates, ect). I know sahm who do nothing all day with the kids. It all depends on the individual and is their decision. PPL need to mind their own business and stop trying to make themselves feel better about their own decisions by putting others down [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 08:54 AM Flag

^^^I saw a show the other day with this debate and some wohm who told this sahm that her kid needs day care because by her staying at home with him he's not getting enough socialization. This woman's comment was so ignorant. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 08:55 AM Flag

slightly off topic - but i have always woh - flexible schedule but pretty much full time - recently my 5 yo has started to notice that friends mom stay homen and has been crying in the mornings BEGGING me not to leave. not sure if this is brought on by other changes as well (starting K in fall, friends leaving city, etc.), but for the first time ever I feel guilty. I'm leaving work in a bit to go have a special lunch date with him - hope some one on one time helps. I really honestly believe there is NO right/wrong answer to the question. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:03 AM Flag

I think what you are doing (the lunch and other one on one times with your dh) is exactly what I would do. I sah but when I had #2 I made sure I had alone time with #1..it really made bringing home another dc easier (not comparing our situations) but alone time really does help [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:10 AM Flag

^^meant with DS not dh [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:12 AM Flag

NP. My dd is younger, but my friends with older kids say this happens when their kids get older. They make every effort to be at seemingly trivial school functions when the other moms are there and also to do special things with the kids (like, Thursday is pizza night). So then you can say "I have to go to work today, but Thursday is pizza night." [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:34 AM Flag

Uh, hello, you are judging those who you assume do "nothing" just because they are not dragging their dbs out to classes and playdates... there is nothing wrong with a quiet, home-based start to life (ps: I *do* bring db to classes, but I don't think it makes for superior mothering)... [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:21 AM Flag

I WOHM FT now 4 days. My pre-baby friends really do a mix of things PT/FT WOHM, SAHM and act pretty normal about it all. The majority - not all - seem to wish they could work PT. Overall I kind of feel like everyone realizes their is no easy answer and struggles. I know there are moms that have to work, but this group is able to choose more or less. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 09:29 AM Flag

I'm surprised this happened IRL. Happens all the time on UB, but I always assumed that IRL, people showed more respect toward others' choices. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 10:35 AM Flag

And it was so upsetting to you that you decided to come here and start the whole thing over again?! [ Reply | More

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General Topics 07.08.08, 10:36 AM Flag