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07.07.08, 18:36 PM Expecting
66 replies
Any thoughts on whether or not a doula is necessary? I am hoping to give birth naturally at SLR birthing center, and not sure if I should get a doula. Anyone who can share their experiences with natural birth with or without doula - would greatly appreciate it! [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Expecting 07.07.08, 06:36 PM Flag
 

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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:38 PM Flag
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I didn't make it even with a doula, but really think a doula can help attain a natural birth - especially if you have an OB instead of a midwife. I have heard great things about SLR for natural deliveries. GL! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:45 PM Flag
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I'm delivering there too in August, but not in the Birthing Center, the part with the Drugs. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:48 PM Flag
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Love it - Drugs with a Capital D. After all my planning, I ended up with the Drugs - back labor was way too hard for me, even with the birthing ball and the amazing back rub thing my doula did. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:50 PM Flag
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Damn Straight, my OB/GYN asked early on what my plan was, it never entered my mind to try birthing without an Epidural. In my twenties, I thought that sounded great to doit that way, at 39, forget it, it sounds horrible but I want drugs and lots of them! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 07:08 PM Flag
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I did it at 41 and 44. So it's possible! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 05:58 AM Flag
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at 33 i want drugs!!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 12.01.12, 02:34 AM Flag
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Keep in mind any chemical intervention you take increases risk of harm to the baby. that's all [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 09:28 PM Flag
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I never found any real evidence to support that in the case of the epidural. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 04:50 AM Flag
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np: i think that most of the studies look at agpar scores and come to the conclusion of no risk. however, there is increasing anecdotal evidence that with epidurals, newborns are sleepier for up to several days after birth as well as have more feeding issues (esp. w BF). While I still chose to get an epi, I think it's good to recognize these issues and be aware of them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:05 PM Flag
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I had a csection and my dd started nursing a few hours later- no issues... to each their own. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:08 PM Flag
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ditto. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 04:23 AM Flag
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i think an epi for planned c-section (limited duration) versus epi for the extended time of labor is different too. i'm not saying it WILL happen, I'm saying that there is a growing body of evidence that in comparison with NO epi, more newborns have this issue. Like I said, I still opted for epi, but it's not right to say there is NO risk to the baby. Risk doesn't mean something WILL happen, it just means an increased chance that something MIGHT happen. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:22 AM Flag
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Very little risk for the baby. As I said below, almost all risk is for the mother. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 12.26.08, 12:21 AM Flag
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There is no hard evidence to suggest epidurals harm the baby in any way, and there's been a lot of research. The main side-effects can be back problems for the mother, but they are fairly rare. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 12.26.08, 12:21 AM Flag
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I couldn't have done it without my doula [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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I did no planning and had two natural births [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:51 PM Flag
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I would recommend it, and studies show that women who use a doula are significantly less likely to end up with c/s or epidural use and that when epidurals are used, they're used later in labor. Also, women who use doulas are much more likely to feel happy and satisfied with their births. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 06:58 PM Flag
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I used one. Wouldn't say "necessary", but mine was a great cheerleader and advocate - helped push me through as best she could, and didn't take a break during my 30 hours of labor (that wound up in a c-section in the end - baby wouldn't fit through and was bruising after 2 hours of pushing at the end). I'd recommend using one still - even if just for the extra support. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 07:01 PM Flag
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30 hours!!!! Holy Shit, You're scaring me. Did the offer a C-Section before the 30 hour mark? You do deserve a medal! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 07:17 PM Flag
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Oh yeah... my 1st was 30 hours too. My doula was a godsend. There was no way DH could have not fallen asleep at some point and I really needed someone to be with me the whole time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 07:28 PM Flag
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He would have fallen asleep while you were in labor and pain? Not a good dude, seriously. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 08:27 AM Flag
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They kept talking about it - I knew it could happen but was really afraid of one. I \ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 08:40 PM Flag
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^^ (sorry) - My doula was there all the way though, and even though my birth was almost everything opposite of what I had wanted, she was a great help and advocate for me (and my DH too) esp. with us knowing nothing really about some of the process. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 08:43 PM Flag
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I used one and highly recommend it. There are very specific things that help during labor and a trained person knows what they are. GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 07:24 PM Flag
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I ended up getting an epidural (i was not passionately committed to a natural birth) but I found my doula to be really wonderful. I had some complications and she was enormously helpful in getting me through them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 07:29 PM Flag
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Necessary? Not at all. DH and I hired one for our childs birth at Columbia and it was a very positive experience. I know some have not had such positive experiences too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 09:23 PM Flag
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I used a doula, I was induced at 42 weeks and my contractions were 2 minutes on two minutes off for 12 hours, no painkillers, before I scored a csection. I alternated Lamaze, Bradley and my own coping skills (I told jokes between contractions every now and then). It was the most empowering thing I ever did. It was simply my own experience. I put her in charge of not letting me know how may hours had passed and she dis so successfully, among other things. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 09:41 PM Flag
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Using a doula for me was never a question. A doula's sole purpose is you, the big fat pregnant one who may not be thinking clearly. I had several discussions with our doula about what we wanted ideally but also what would feel okay for me. We were both clear that I wanted to try to go natural as long as possible but wanted the option for meds if I felt I needed them. My doula was completely on board. In delivery, she served as my comfort, my coach, and my advocate. I felt completely comfortable that she would support me in whatever decision I made. As it happens, a woman who screams intensely from a from a stubbed toe made it through without meds. I feel at the end we had a birth that we felt good about but not because I did it naturally, but because I was able to have as much choice and comfort as possible. I think bad experiences might happen if the doula has one idea about childbirth (agenda) and then gives direct or indirect pressure to the mom. If it's a new mom, you may make a great birth plan with no meds, numerous comfort strategies, and then realize very quickly- you can't have that kind of birth. The doula needs to be able to roll with that. This is my first post because I had such a great experience with out doula. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 01:05 AM Flag
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op: you are me! i also scream from a stubbed toe - my dh is skeptical of me making it to the end for that reason! thanks so much for all the replies. im going to speak to some doulas and see how i feel. i have an ob btw, not a midwife, which is why im considering a doula. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 05:20 AM Flag
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Isn't that what a DH is for? In all my three births DH Was the best person to be with me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 08:26 AM Flag
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there was a possibility my husband woud be with our older kid so i hired a doula. also, frankly, he doesn't handle me in pain very well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 12:08 PM Flag
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definitely get a doula if you are considering no meds a desirable option! definitely. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 03:40 AM Flag
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Natural birth at SLR with midwife, no doula. If I had an OB, which I wouldn't, I'd have a doula. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 04:12 AM Flag
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I had 2 drug-free births, both with OBs (NYU and SLR), without doulas. Took a Bradley class for #1 (although only made it through half the class before dd arrived) and a refresher class at RealBirth for #2. It's certainly possible to do this w/o a doula (if you and your DH/partner are well prepared), but I also think having a doula can be a wonderful support. Either way, SLR is very supportive generally of drug-free births. Had planned #2 for BC, but she came too fast! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 05:40 AM Flag
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I gave birth twice at SLR without using drugs but I had to advocate for myself the first time quite a bit. (This was five years ago when natural birth was still a bit new on the L&D floor.) Then they sent a nurse from the Birthing Center to help out and she was great. The second time the nurse was on board from the beginning. I've done it twice. Just when you think you can't handle it anymore, it's time to give birth! Good luck! If you stick with it, you can do it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 05:57 AM Flag
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I don't want to start a big flameout here, but you might try asking yourself WHY you want a natural birth. Everyone has their reasons, and I will say right at the outset that I planned to have an epidural all along. However I can tell you from experience that I felt PLENTY during the birth, did not feel like I missed a moment of the experience, and my baby was awake and alert from the first moment. I looked into this pretty carefully and i never found any science supporting the idea that epidurals hurt the baby. All I missed out on was hours of grinding pain--I was in labor for about 24 hours. No matter how you give birth--epidural, no meds, c-section, it is the experience of a life-time. Natural is not the "only" or "real" way, and don't let anyone tell you that. You wouldn't have knee surgery without medication, would you? Not trying to force any opinion on you, just offering some thoughts. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:45 AM Flag
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NP: It always surprises me when people like you somehow think that other women's choices are not as valid as their own. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 08:15 AM Flag
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no, no, I am trying to say that every choice is valid--I just felt that when I was pg the "natural birth" people were trying to make me feel like any other way is a cop-out and also gave me a lot of mis-information about epidurals that I was trying to clear up. I guess in a way though you are right, I just don't understand why someone would willingly sign up for so much pain when it is totally unnecessary, what are you trying to prove? I have also heard so many stories about people who went for natural, and then ended up getting an epidural or c-section anyway, which seems like the worst of both worlds. Only my opinion though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:57 AM Flag
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What does it matter to you what women choose? I "willingly" signed up for so much pain because birth is a natural process, not a medical one. I didn't see the need to have drugs if I could do it without. If I had needed medical intervention, I would have had it but I didn't. I don't like anesthesia in general but I don't begrudge anyone having it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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np: Some of us don't react well to the drugs. I am one of those people, so just avoid if I at all can. Last thing I wanted was another adverse reaction to drugs while deliving my child. Epidural is not for everyone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 05:01 PM Flag
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nnp: I was you after my first birth (doula, epi), but my second was natural (got to hospital 20 mins before birth) and was such an insanely exhilarating experience that I am still exhilarated from it 7 mos later -- it was just such an intense high. I always thought natural birth advocates were loonies, but I think un-intervention-ized births, when they go well, can hit a high note I didn't know was there, and I am grateful I got to experience it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.11.08, 05:19 PM Flag
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That's great to hear. I couldn't agree more. I still have a high thinking about both births. And the best thing was that I could get up and walk after it! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.13.08, 09:06 PM Flag
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np: i had an epidural with my first birth adn did not want one for #2. For me, the epidural was unpleasant and distancing. I understand that is not everyone's experience. but if i had a 3d i'd try for natural again. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 11:30 AM Flag
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ditto! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.11.08, 05:22 PM Flag
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it is a fact that the more intervention, the more likely a c-section is (and I got an epi with #1, only didn't with #2 because I couldn't) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 01:40 PM Flag
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not convinced [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.22.08, 08:16 AM Flag
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Me too. Six hours, with epidural, it rocked. Why have the pain if you don't have to? I opted for drugs when I got my wisdom teeth out, too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 12.26.08, 12:23 AM Flag
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I had an unmedicated birth at the SLR birthing center with a midwife and no doula. A doula wasn't necessary for us because the L&D nurse essentially served as one; she was with me and DH 95% of my labor there, and suggested positions, rubbed my back, encouraged me to drink water. That said, I encourage having a doula there because a laboring woman can use all the help she can get! Seriously, it's nice to have as much support as possible--we didn't hire a doula only because we couldn't afford one. Good luck! The birthing center is a really wonderful place to have a baby--everyone was so kind and it was great for the 3 of us to spend the night together afterwards. I had a long and difficult back labor that would have been impossible to do unmedicated in another setting. Enjoy your baby! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 06:55 AM Flag
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If you are delivering with an OB, not a midwife, then yes, get a doula. it will help with laboring at home, before you are admitted. I did. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.08.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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I had a natural birth in the SLR birthing center. Besides my MW, my DH was a big help and I didn't want any other help. I u/s that some people feel that you need all the help and support you can get, but I really didn't even need the nurse who was assigned to my room and she was pretty happy to sit on the sidelines since she 30something weeks pg and tired out. So, having a doula or not depends on whether you need the extra support or not and also I think whether you have a MW or OB. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 04:08 AM Flag
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I gave birth at SLR, I wish I had a doula at the time, to talk some sense into my crazy midwife. The birthing center was full and I had to travel back and forth to a hotel room to her office to be checked while waiting for a room for hours while in intense severe labor (labored in cabs, in street etc.). If you want the birthing center be aware the rooms may not be available. My midwife was insane and did not put me up in the regular floor until 30 hours of natural labor went by (without drugs) with no progress at all. I strongly believe a doula would have slapped her silly and told me that I needed help (after 20 more hours with drugs after the first 30 hours of natural labor I FINALLY got a c-section). My midwife should be in prison. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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omg - that is cruel. sorry you went through that! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 05:36 PM Flag
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If your doula comes to labor at home, then yes absolutely. If they only meet you at birth ctr..i'm mixed. A doula can be wonderful if you are open to it. I loved mine. I am delivering at a ctr though now that has midwives and the doula in our area wasn;t going to come to our home for early delivery (we were a bit far for her) and so i am going without this time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.09.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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YES - i gave birth at SLR (regular L&D) and wanted a non-medicated delivery. The OB on call was not so supportive. A doula would have been very helpful as my dh -- wonderful as he was -- was not really equipped to be my advocate with the nursing and medical staff. However if you're in the birthing center the midwife & nurses might be enough. Also I recommend watching "The Business of Being Born." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 09:50 AM Flag
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I had a natural vbac and couldn't have done it without my doula. The key was to stay home as long as I could, and she made that possible by being there with me every minute of it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 03:18 PM Flag
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I've had two at SLR birthing center. With #1, I'd say the doula was absolutely worth it. Very long labor and delivery, and it was great to have someone around to spell dh. With #2, it was still nice -- got to love the foot massages -- but I could probably have done without. Now pg with number 3 and debating whether or not to get one. If this is your first, I say get one but make sure it's someone you really click with. With natural childbirth, it's good to have a lot of support (and the labor nurses at the birthing center were wonderful both times I was there). As long as other issues don't arise, I think it's makes it more likely you will actually deliver without meds. Good luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.10.08, 03:26 PM Flag
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doula: a thousand times YES. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.11.08, 01:03 AM Flag
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Loved our doula - she was with me for 24 hours of labor - natural birth - helped us navigate the hospital, helped my dh with how to help me, had great pain management techniques. I had not realized, prior, how in the hospital, you don't really see your OB until the pushing stage and that there are a steady stream of nurses. Doula never left, never slept. Let my dh get food, sleep. Highly recommend it! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.11.08, 08:34 AM Flag
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It might help but it's not necessary. I did it without one and (granted I had a really short labor) it was fine. Looking back I was concentrating so hard on blocking out the pain that I don't think I would have even been able to deal with another person in there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.13.08, 10:17 AM Flag
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All this talk about natural birth is making me want to have a third!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.13.08, 09:08 PM Flag
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I gave birth twice at NYU, with OB, natural births with no doula. Whether you are able to stick with the natural birth plan depends on how the particular labor goes (i.e., how long, and if there are complications) and your stamina and pain threshold. DH was great, labor nurses were great - don't see that a doula is a necessary part of the events. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 12:34 PM Flag
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I have a question that I have been wondering about since my ds's birth. I went to classes at Real Birth and planned to stay home as long as possible. But my contractions started at midnight and by 1:00 they were less than three minutes apart and unbearable so I went to hospital. Is this just what happens or is it usually a slower progression like they taught in the class? BTW I ended up with c-section, b/c of the size and shape of my pelvis ds could not get into birth canal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.14.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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I would not have been able to give birth without my doula. She was a tremendous support and presence. Your midwife will also be busy guiding the birth. The doula's job is completely different. She's there to help you during all the contractions. She will literally hold you up. Doulas have experience and have a plethora of knowledge and support to share with you during the birth. You will NOT regret it! I can't express enough to you how important the confidence and emotional support of a doula is during the birth, for both you and your partner. My doula also made me feel reassured in my decisions with the birth of my baby, when the hospital staff was making me doubt myself. Go for it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 12.26.08, 12:13 AM Flag
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Having given birth there, I really think a doula would help. I also wanted to use the birthing center, and I thought I picked a practice that supported it--they advertised themselves as such. Instead, I got stuck with the one doctor in the practice who evidently didn't like it very much. The nurses really had to advocate for her to let me even go there (not because there were any risks, she just didn't want to have to walk between floors to check on me there). Also not to try and induce me because I was "not progressing as fast as the other lady she was taking care of," etc. It was awful, and if my husband were not an MD and the nurses didn't stick up to her too, I wouldn't have even made it to the birthing center. And remember this was a doctor who supposedly supported birthing there! A doula can be a great advocate, especially one who is familiar with the birthing center policies and how you get risked out/can avoid getting risked out. Tons of people get risked out because they are not hydrated enough when they get there... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 12.01.12, 02:49 AM Flag
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^^That said, the birthing center nurses--if you make it there--are AWESOME. really great! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 12.01.12, 02:50 AM Flag
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