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07.07.08, 13:20 PM General Topics
27 replies
Just got married 3 months ago but have been with dh for 3 years. He is now having SERIOUS babylust, every time we see a baby or spend time with kids he tells me "I want one". I want one too (I used to be a nanny which is how I started reading this board), but think we need a little time... any advice from those who have btdt? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.07.08, 01:20 PM Flag
 

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just do it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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why? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:22 PM Flag
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interesting - so rare for a dh to have babylust! I would just set clear expectations , like "lets wait until we've been married a year, then strt trying. Our lives will change so much and I want to enjoy US married for a little while. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:23 PM Flag
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thanks... I will try saying it like that (I have said that I want to wait a little while, have an US, etc., but he sees that we've been together for a while and nothing has really changed in our relationship, so he thinks we're ready). I also wish I could "borrow" a newborn for a few days/nights so he can see how much work a baby really is! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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Maybe watch Baby Borrowers? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:28 PM Flag
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that show is ridiculous - dh and I are far more competent than any of those people [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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Having and raising dc is so much more than being competent. I think you're missing the point that you're still very young and raising dc in todays world means more than just knowing what you're doing. Time and age makes a person more wise. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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I understand your point, but mine was about the ridiculousness of that show which only shows stupid people who can't handle things like changing diapers. I agree that I am young, but many people have children MUCH younger than 25 and do just fine. DH and I are both smart, well-educated, come from good families and have had lots of experience in life. As I said I was also a nanny and know a lot about raising kids in today's world [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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Don't listen to the snarky people op, it sounds like both you and dh are going to be great parents. 25 is not young for a parent. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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how old are you? Can you both afford a baby? If so, I would go ahead. This board is full of women who wait too long and go through all sorts of hoops to try to have a kid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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Well, I am only 25, dh is 29. We can afford a baby, but it would be difficult (next year DH gets a big raise so that would make things easier, since it is larger than my yearly salary). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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Wait at least 3 years [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:29 PM Flag
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You guys should really wait. I think so many woman aren't anywhere near ready for a db at 25. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:30 PM Flag
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I was a nanny and have lots of experience with kids, love them and know how to handle them, so I think I am more than ready in that respect. Actually, I think dh is the one who isn't really ready [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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where are you in your career? your education? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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I have a master's degree and a good job in an unfortunately low-paying field. I don't have a problem being a SAH mom for the first years of dcs lives, and working part-time (consulting) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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wait! use the money to travel and start trying in a couple of years. having a baby is great but only if you've had couple time first. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:31 PM Flag
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This said, I am nothing like the above posters. Do what makes you happy. I'm sure you will be good parents. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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DH & I were 34 and pregnant when we got married. I wish we would have had time together w/o me being pregnant. But it was getting late in the game to have dc so we moved quickly. If you're younger than that I'd wait. If not you might have to start working on it. If you're really young, less than 25 certainly wait. Give it two years at least to get over the honeymoon. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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why do you think you need a little time? How old are you? How old is he? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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Wait 'til the honeymoon is over before you start trying, unless you're an old bag. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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we waited until we were married one year beofre ttc. Dh wanted to starte immediately and I wanted to wait 2 years. I got pregnant the first motnh we tried at age 33. My advice: travel somewhere cool and exotic, have a summer share house, enoy treadin tghe Sunday paper. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:27 PM Flag
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why does he want one? i think it's a little strange that he does. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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My dh wants kids, is that strange too? What an odd response. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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why do you think it is strange? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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Having a baby really does change the relationship. I'd wait. I'm sure you're great w/ kids, but you just don't know the 24-7 of it and how that affects the relationship until you're there. It's tough. That said, it really isn't an age thing; everyone is different... but wait until *you* have no doubts (not no doubts about how it will all pan out, how you'll handle it financially and emotionally, etc., but no doubts that you want the child *right now and for the rest of your lives*) gl... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.07.08, 05:34 PM Flag
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