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07.04.08, 20:32 PM General Topics
18 replies
I feel such sorrow for my pdd-nos daughter, now 8. I made so many mistakes, the main one being that I gave her mercury vaccines and the next one being that I constantly lost my cool with her. She has had a miserable childhood. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.04.08, 08:32 PM Flag
 

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The vaccines aren't the cause. Stop beating yourself up [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:43 PM Flag
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Yes, they were a cause. Mercury is a neurotoxin. Millions of moms are not wrong about what they experienced with their children. Either way, my dc's life has been ruined. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:45 PM Flag
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It's not the cause. And stop blaming yourself [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:52 PM Flag
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How do you know it's not the cause? Do you believe everything the government tells you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:53 PM Flag
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After mercury was taken out of the shots, the cases of autism and kids on the spectrum didn't go down, they spiked. Also, my ped (aka not the government) told me the mercury in all of the shots kids got combined in their lives added up to the mercury in one can of tuna. Mercury in shots is not the reason. Sorry about your kid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:57 PM Flag
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My kid is older than yours. When she got her vaccines, there were MUCH higher levels of mercury. It's the damage that was done to our kids that convinced government to recommend removal of mercury from vaccines. There have not been any comprehensive studies done that show a spike or significant reduction in autism since removal of mercury. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:59 PM Flag
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it's not the government telling people. there's very extensive research on the topic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:59 PM Flag
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The research in US to date is government controlled research. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:00 PM Flag
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I don't know what pdd-nos is, but you need to give yourself a break. You love your dd and it is not your fault. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:47 PM Flag
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I do love her, it's true, but I don't think I mothered her well. I was so despondent and impatient to see improvements, I constantly yelled at her, engaged in strict behavior in the name of Applied Behavior Analysis, etc. It's been an unimaginably difficult experience. We're all bruised and damaged, but especially this poor helpless child who remains in my care. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:50 PM Flag
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We all make mistakes (or think we do) with our children. I have lost my cool with dd and dh had to, we feel terrible when this happens, but we are human. I am sure that your feelings are intensified due to your situation, but try to see it is just that and give yourself a break. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:54 PM Flag
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thanks yes -- things are pretty intensified for us because of her relentless tantruming and rigidity. But I should have known better -- it's just that after so many years, day in day out -- it becomes overwhelming. Still, my dd deserved better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:57 PM Flag
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why don't you get therapy to deal with your frustration etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:59 PM Flag
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I do :( [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:02 PM Flag
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sorry to be clueless. what is pdd-nos? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:52 PM Flag
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pervasive developmental disorder -- not otherwise specified. People have some but not all the symptoms of autism. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:55 PM Flag
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she's only 8! she has a lot more of her childhood to go -- you sound defeated. she doesn't have to have any more of a miserable childhood. you recognize stuff you havne't liked that you've done; you have time to change. Get parenting support if you have to. She's lucky to have such a thoughtful mom. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 01:19 AM Flag
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I gave my child vaccines (dc is 12), ignoring the warnings I had heard. And.. nothing happened. Millions of moms gave their kids vaccines and nothing happened. You got unlucky. YOu have to let that one go adn move on. I also made many mistakes with dc - didn't get dc evaluated, didn't get dc OT when dc was informally diagnosed with various things (not as serious as yours), wrong babysitter, wrong preschool, wrong elementary school. DC was a basket case by 3rd grade who needed psychiatric intervention. DC has definitely suffered some trauma that will be with DC in one way or another whole life. All because mom was stupid, in denial, lacking in insight, etc. BUT I eventually figured out I was screwing up and changed what I could change about situation and myself and my parenting and DC much much better now. Kids are very responsive. 8 is not very old. You can stop feeling guilty which is self indulgent and get on the case to do better. SN kids are very hard; we are nto all saints like in Lifetime movies. Your guilt is more meaningful if you redeem it by change. It's not too late for your child, regardless of her issues. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 09:52 AM Flag
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