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07.04.08, 08:24 AM NY Schools
31 replies
I guess we are one of those families that decided to go accept the outcome last year and send our dc to one of those undesirable gen ed that has a majority of low income and minority families with limited parent involvement, little money or resources, as we knew dozens of people in our circle wrangle the system through lying about addresses, using a back door connection and any means possible to get their child into one of the “better” schools. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
NY Schools 07.04.08, 08:24 AM Flag
 

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>>While it has been a difficult year and I can see the down side, mostly do to the attitudes of those who feel sorry for my dc because we are at that “bad” school, I can’t help thinking our dc may be better off in the long run. I can’t imagine what it would be like to be in an environment with people who not only condone “cheating” but goes to the great lengths to justify it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:24 AM Flag
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>>>I wonder what this discrepancy in race, class and culture in our schools is teaching our children. What you may get in large PTA fundraising and higher test scores may be at the expense of expanding their understanding about their world. I guess it goes to one’s core values as to what’s the best education for their children. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:25 AM Flag
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Yes, we all need to justify our outcomes and reconcile them. We all do it, good luck to you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:27 AM Flag
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well call me a shallow elitisit but I want my child to learn reading, writing, math, history and science in school. Foolish me. What my child should learn in school is that poor people get shafted and that if mc peoiple hang out with poor people, they too will get shafted. And there's nothing that can be done about it. Who needs reading writing and rithmetic when you can learn that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:10 PM Flag
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op: You are assuming that kids who attend a school with mostly low income minority students don't learn academics. This is not necessarily trure. If children can learn to read, write,math, science, social studies along with the arts AND learn about diversity all the better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 07:22 AM Flag
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and..... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 08:25 AM Flag
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it is so obvious to me, that someone likes to start these posts - I have no idea why - but they have been far too frequent of late. Whats up with this debate? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:37 AM Flag
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To cheat or not to cheat. Some do it and some don't. What are the advantanges or disadvantages. What do each of us choose to do and why. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:45 AM Flag
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How about, live and let live. Have your morals. You don't need to shout them from the mountain tops. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:47 AM Flag
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NP -and you would not mind perhaps except you might feel uncomfortable with your own? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:53 AM Flag
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nope. I'm cool with my moral code. And I totally follow the live and let live thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 01:13 PM Flag
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UB is the top of a mountain? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 04:45 PM Flag
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May I (seriously) ask how your child is doing? May I also ask % of free lunch and % of white kids in the school. We will be in this position. We have 2% white kids and 94% free lunch. I'm worried, but I also potentially see some advantages...I think...It's such a big decision, the biggest I've ever faced and I would really like to know how others in the same situation are faring. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 10:28 AM Flag
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NP: so depends on the school. TAG (one of the 3 "citywides") has about those stats, and is an excellent school. It's really about the quality of the teaching and the willingness of the students to learn, not the race of the students or how many qualify for free lunch. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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and the level of priority parents put on education. that's why tag is such a good school. all those parents had their kids tested for g&t. they care about education, no matter what the race is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 11:20 AM Flag
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Well, I'm certainly not talkinga about TAG. I've tried to ask this question before, and I really want honest answers. I guess most UB posters aren't in this situation, but it looked like this one was: I'm still asking the same question: anybody out there ever sent your child to a school where 1)your child is going to enter school having learned more than the other kids because you have a signifcantly higher educational level than your neighbors (we both hold advanced degrees) and has most probably heard more words at home, already learned to read, etc., and do any anglos have fears about your child being treated differently or bullied because your child is white. It is possible that my child will be the only white child in her grade. I'm not trying to be racist. I don't consider myself racist. This IS my neighborhood. I just worry that I will put her in a situation that might end up hurting her. I'm really torn. I'd like to hear from people in the same situation (seems like OP was) or who have already gone there and can tell me their feelings. I know a lot of people feel like early education is just about sdrawing and cutting, but I really bellieve that early ed. sets the foundation for a love of learning, so I do take it seriously. This school teaches spanish, and I would love that for my child. I would also love her to appreciate and respect all people, even people who may be culturally very different from her. But I don't want to be some kind of cockeyed optimist and have my child pay the price for it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 01:26 PM Flag
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op:70% free lunch and around 95% children of color. My dc hasn't been bullied yet(but did experience bullying in an all white preschool), but I would say that dc is very aware of skin color along with some of the cultural difference. But, dc has made many friends and looks forward to going back for 1st grade. Dc is doing well academically, but not the best in the class. And, this is a not highly regarded gen ed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 04:24 PM Flag
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np, I have no idea what % of students qualify for free lunch at my dc's school. Off to find out... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 05:30 PM Flag
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Thank you! This is helpful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:06 PM Flag
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op:You're welcome. Ask any questions you may have. It would be helpful to have a thread where we can have an honest discussion. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 07:27 AM Flag
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I'm the OR who mentioned TAG, but I have white friends at local zoned school which is mostly non-white with majority qualifying for free lunch, and their DD (who has been there K-2) had never been bullied. They've been surprised to find themselves so happy there, except that they are not happy that there are so few parents involved in any way (which they feel is both a bad and a good thing). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 07:43 PM Flag
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^^also they are a little concerned that DD is picking up some loose language and mannerisms from classmates, but in general, they've been happy with the quality of the education. Interestingly, their DD has always gotten a lot more homework and focus on rigorous academics than our DC at a highly regarded G&T, and her classes seem to have had fewer behavioral problems than ours (or maybe they are just kept in line better there?). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 07:47 PM Flag
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Honestly, my child is not white. I would personally prefer a school that is not uber white. However, if the school has bad scores and a majority of dc on free lunch I would not do it. I worked for the DOE for 10 years and have seen too much at these types of schools. If a majority of the parents do not value education it is very hard for teachers and administrators to provide a quality education. Just my opinion, from my experience. GL. IF you want to mention the school I might be able to give you more specific feedback. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.04.08, 09:05 PM Flag
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I can't tell you do it if I had not done it myself. Our zoned school is mostly minority and as much as I would like my dd to learn about diversity, I might have put him in a situation that no kid should be in--the only white kid in the class. I would be happy if he were in 20% of white kids but when he is the only one or 2 of white kids, I can't see how this would not be a problem? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 05:08 AM Flag
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It's difficult for any child to be so in the minority (white, black or latina) also because you've set up the "buffet" for them to shape their ideas of what is desireable as they mature and form their own sexuality even in elementary. My white gf who grew up in Paterson was conditioned to only find black guys sexually appealing, for example. That's also why black UMC educated in mostly white schools end up with mates that aren't black. It's an imprint from a young age. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 05:20 AM Flag
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^^If it's important to you that your child evenutually be with someone of the same ethnic background, consider his/her environment now. If it really doesn't matter to you, you don't have to weigh this in obviously. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 05:21 AM Flag
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op:since we are concerned with this issue too, we have tried to expose our dc to more children from a similar background through afterschool activities and summer day camp. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 07:36 AM Flag
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Not one person I know in an interracial relationship, including myself, grew up with a majority of the spouses ethnic/racial group. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 08:01 AM Flag
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I think the success or failure of those early years is about the classroom teacher more than anything else. When I was an undergrad taking ed classes, some of my peers who really "had it" wanted nothing but to teach at struggling schools. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 08:03 AM Flag
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It is always more about the parents. A good classroom teacher can build on what the parents are doing/value, but cannot make up for a lack of interest in education. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 08:06 AM Flag
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You are 100% correct. I should have been more clear- I meant of the variables, of the things outside the home, in the early years, it is about the classroom teacher. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.05.08, 08:30 AM Flag
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