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07.02.08, 07:21 AM General Topics
22 replies
dd's second day of camp. she said the other girls didn't play with her. what am i supposed to do? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.02.08, 07:21 AM Flag
 

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^^^and it sounded more like they were mean to her rather than that they just didn't include her. although my dd is an incredible pessimist. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:21 AM Flag
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tell her to keep trying, or see if there are any other girls that "the girls" aren't playing with and make friends with them [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:22 AM Flag
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that's a good idea. thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:31 AM Flag
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I just posted below. HOw old are these girls? I Have 2 dds and found the mean girls start very young [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:23 AM Flag
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^^also tell her that if they are being mean, she doesn't want to play with mean girls anyway. Look for others and it's ok to play with the boys too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:23 AM Flag
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yes, it starts really young. dd is 5, the girls are mostly 5 and 6yo. she said a few things in the past year about girls in her class being mean but it wasn't a problem b/c she had her own friends. however, she only knows one girl from this camp. i'm hoping that as she gets to know people, they'll play with her. but i'm really afraid that it'll just snowball into something unpleasant. do you think blowing this out of proportion? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:25 AM Flag
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no..my oldest dd is 8yr old and even now I still see mean things going on. I think being honest with your dd about how some of these mean kids are and how she should react is good. Better to arm her with honesty than to sugar coat it and try to conceal her from reality. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:27 AM Flag
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thanks. i'm going to give it another day or two of telling her to keep trying and then i'll switch to the "if they are so mean you don't want to play with them anyway" approach. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:30 AM Flag
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exactly..I would do the same. I would tell her give it a few days because they don't know her but if they continue..to hell with them (I wouldn't say that to dd) but you know what I mean [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:31 AM Flag
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^^BTW just yesterday my dd had to stand up for a smaller, shy girl that other girls in camp were bothers. This small girl (she's the same age 8yr) wasn't invited to a party and the bday girl asked my dd to talk more about the party to annoy the other girl. My dd said I will not do that because it's not right. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:30 AM Flag
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good for her. these kids can be so nasty. it's sad. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:32 AM Flag
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yes they can and as a person who was picked on because I was shy, I have raised both of my dds that being mean is never acceptable..even when someone gets on our nerves [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:33 AM Flag
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ask her if she went up to them and introduced herself. If she didn't suggest she do just that. Many kids go to camp with others they already know and it's hard being the odd man out. If they continue to ignore her why things like this may happen [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:22 AM Flag
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nothing. let her figure it out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:23 AM Flag
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np: I disagree with this. As a parent they come to us for advice. I think it's a bit harsh to tell a small child, figure it out [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:24 AM Flag
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personalize it... "When I was young, and people who I wanted to play with didn't want to play with me I either found other people to play with or I tried doing what they were doing." My son complained that nobody on the playground at recess in Kindergarten would play with him. My short hairs stood up. I was ready to go down to his school the next day and start kicking ass. Then I asked him if he knew why. "No." So I asked him what they said to him. "They say 'we don't want to play chase the land shark." What is chase the land shark I asked. He went on for fifteen minutes about this game he had made up which sounded like it would have been fun for only one child on the face of God's green earth and that kid was looking for others to stop playing their fun games to try and learn how to play his... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 08:02 AM Flag
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op: i haven't had time to get online recently but i am checking old posts and i wanted to thank you for your response. i think you have a good point and i'm biding my time to see exactly what the problem is. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 12:20 PM Flag
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de nada. (I stopped watching this so it is "good" UB is so slow.) So often the back story is the bigger issue and we don't even realize it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 12:53 PM Flag
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This is so funny. I could totally see my DS doing that too. I try to really stop and listen and wait to see what comes out before reacting. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 12:57 PM Flag
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yeah but that protective parent response can be so powerful! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 02:30 PM Flag
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This post reminds me why I am happy to be pg with ds #2. This brings back so many depressing memories from my childhood. I knew "mean" girls all through college - and the one who were mean in grade school are still the mean girls. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 12:33 PM Flag
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There were 3 mean girls in DS's kinder class this year--a queen bee & two wannabes. It really had an impact on the other girls in the class in a very negative way. I would be so upset if my DD were doing that. She's 2.5 right now and it's something I hope doesn't happen in the future. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.03.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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