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07.02.08, 06:56 AM General Topics
8 replies
Can someone help me through this strange phase I'm going through? I have a 3.5yr old girl, and a 3.5 m/o boy, and I don't feel like I'm bonding great with the baby. It still feels hard to me to have 2 kids, have a baby again, and now be back at work. But shouldn't I know that this gets better? Why have I lost all perspective? I feel so stuck in it now. Any advice? BTDT? Thanks. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 07.02.08, 06:56 AM Flag
 

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It is hard to have all that you have on your plate and maybe you just need to let yourself be "not so great" or Supermom right now. It's a day at tme and a week at a time sort of thing... Can you get any time at all - an hour here or there - for yourself ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:00 AM Flag
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Thanks. Not really much time for myself (I'm also looking for a new job at the same time!). When I get a free hour, I try to spend it with dc #1, because I also miss the alone time we used to have together. My time alone is after they both go to bed, but then I wake up exhausted in the morning. Sigh. It feels tough, but I feel stupid complaining - because I feel I should have more perspective. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:03 AM Flag
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When you're exhausted, perspective is hard to come by. I sometimes told myself "They go through phases, so do adults." You're exhausted and probably looking at what seems like a whole lot of years of being exhausted and pulled in diff. directions, but it will get easier and better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:05 AM Flag
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Thanks. I need to keep hearing that from people who have gone through it. Now that I'm stuck in it, it feels like it'll never get easier! Thanks for the encouragement! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:06 AM Flag
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you're welcome. we all have been there, but some of us like to say that it was all song birds and soft cuddles ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:09 AM Flag
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I think that's normal. I love DC#2, but I (irrationally) resent how much more complicated it can be than when there was just one DB. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:01 AM Flag
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ITA it's certainly not just double the work ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:06 AM Flag
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i find that a lot of people feel like this with second (or later) kids. i think it's b/c we are already used to a different type of interaction. we are used to having kids talk and communicate and demanding a different type of attention. so we think there's no connection with the babies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 07:08 AM Flag
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