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06.24.08, 14:04 PM General Topics
62 replies
DH went to Yale, as did his father and my grandfather. DH decided this year we would begin contributing there (I am newly pg with #1)... he's so confident that dcs will have a better chance of getting in if we do this, but I think its kind of delusional... any thoughts? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:04 PM Flag
 

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Unless he's contributing enough to fund professorial chairs or build buildings he's delusional. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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My thoughts are that worrying about college before the child is even born...is so far beyond insane that I don't know what to say. It's a child, not a portfolio. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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op - that is the way I feel about it, DH just wants to keep it a possibility for 18 years down the road [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:07 PM Flag
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Then how will dc feel if 18 years down the road he/she doesn't want to go? That's a lot of pressure to put on a kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:09 PM Flag
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I agree, and we won't put pressure of dcs to go to any specific school. DH just had such a great college experience he wants to help keep it open if that is what our dc wants to do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:09 PM Flag
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You can call it what you want, but putting down money for 18 years is pressure. Any child with any degree of sensitivity will be aware of how much his/her parent wants that, if they go that far. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:19 PM Flag
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contributing to an alumni fund of a school you loved is pressure? only for the most sensitive of people [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:21 PM Flag
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Doing it with the sheer intention of getting your child in, yes. They haven't been contributing before. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:23 PM Flag
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DH only graduated 6 years ago, and before this year we haven't really been making enough money for charitable contributions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:24 PM Flag
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I went to an Ivy and heard that children/grandchildren of some of the major contributors (i.e. with several buildings named after them) did not necessarily get in anymore based on legacy. Children who are accepted to Ivies have good scores/grades but also show potential to be *leaders* - that's really what they look for, leadership potential. Which has zero to do with what high school the child attends. Ivies also like diversity, which is why a midwestern public school student who is an activist and leader in their community with excellent grades will always get in over a rich child from NYC with fine grades, a few extra currics and nothing else to distinguish them. Sometimes an extraordinary athlete might be recruited, but only if they have the academic chops to handle the school. Very nice to give back to your alma mater, though, if you can afford to. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.25.08, 02:57 AM Flag
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Golden's "The Price of Admissions" and various articles dispute what you say. Starting athletes get into top schools with lower SAT scores than the median. "Leadership potential" generally translates into tall rich white guys and not nerdy Asian kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.25.08, 06:20 PM Flag
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Voice of Reason [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:21 PM Flag
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I think it is a great idea; doesn't have to be a lot, but shows commitment & schools love that. That said, I am not doing that, but don't really want my DD's to go to my Alma Mater, Columbia or my prep school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:07 PM Flag
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It will not hurt their chances. The admissions office talks to the alumni office and knows who gives how much, but being an alumni brat doesn't mean as much as it did 20 years ago. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:07 PM Flag
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Does being a 4th gen alum help more than one gen? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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generally, yes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:10 PM Flag
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I think triple legacy might stand out a bit but have your father & grandfather contributed? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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His father has, some, and my grandfather has part of a building named for him but that's because of his public service, not because of $$ he gave [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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Geez. If dc's great grandfather was famous, then your dc can get 800 out of 2700 on SATs and would still get in. Look at GWB. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:22 PM Flag
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wasn't famous at all in my estimation, just a person involved in the supreme court [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:23 PM Flag
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Stll, a bldg named after him. I bet 1300 or 1400 on SAT (math and verbal) will do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:33 PM Flag
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not anymore. Schools like Yale and Williams can fill entire classes with legacies, but they will never do it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:42 PM Flag
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NP: It's not that simple. DD's great-grandfather (DH's grandfather) was a Cabinet Secretary and that and $2 will get her on the subway. It will take a lot more than that to get her into Yale (and she's also a multiple legacy). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:29 PM Flag
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Interesting. My dad was a cabinet secretary and I don't think it helped me much, but then again, I never broadcasted it and it was his job long before i was born. My grandfather (mom's side) was also a cabinet secretary, and my other grandfather was on the Supreme Court. All that being said, I really don't know how that will help my dc's get into school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:33 PM Flag
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Well, now we can ID you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:37 PM Flag
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doubt it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:38 PM Flag
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Maybe not, but it helped you (his name/occupation were on your applications). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:41 PM Flag
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his name was (my dad's), but we have a different last name, and his occupation when I applied for schools was retired, so unless people did research (not a lot of internet when I applied to college ) I doubt it helped [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:43 PM Flag
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Where did YOU go to school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:01 PM Flag
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My Aunt went to Yale,my stepfather went to Yale, one of my half brothers went as well, but my other half brother didn't get in. You still have to work your ass off to get in. Do I think it might help, who knows, probably wouldn't hurt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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^^^ and my stepfather does give, not enough to buy a wing, but has been a very active Alum. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:10 PM Flag
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delusional [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:10 PM Flag
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There are people starving in the world, horrible diseases, social inequities, ecological meltdowns, and the best use for your charitable dollars is giving them to a well-endowed very wealthy college in order to ensure that your child might get a spot (if they want one) in 18 years? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:29 PM Flag
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who is to say that we don't also give to other charitable causes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:31 PM Flag
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Would still mean giving less to other. Not that anyone has to contribute anything to anyone, but your dh's mindset is alien and horrifying to some of us. Obviously lots of people at UB think it's fine and normal but to me, it's scary. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:33 PM Flag
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alien and horrifying? talk about hyperbole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:36 PM Flag
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Not really. That's how I feel. We live in a different mental world. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:37 PM Flag
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and, may I enquire, how much do you contribute to society? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:38 PM Flag
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dh works for an environmental organization. I work for a children's charity. We volunteer about 10 hours a week between us at other organizations and have already started taking dd with us. It's not a chore, we volunteer in ways we enjoy. We don't have much money to donate but we help raise it from those who do. As I said, we live in a different world from people who have 18 years of money to throw away on a possible college chance. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:26 PM Flag
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why do you assume charitable giving is a zero sum endeavor for others? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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Yale is not a charitable organization. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:31 PM Flag
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it doesn't have a 501c3? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.25.08, 09:00 AM Flag
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501c3 means nonprofit, not charitable. So you can donate there and get tax breaks, but it's not a charity out to help anyone except itself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.25.08, 10:10 AM Flag
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It will mean that dc will at least get a courtesy interview, but it won't be any kind of a slam dunk [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:35 PM Flag
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wouldn't dc's get an interview just for legacy's sake? screw the donations - you don't even have a baby yet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:39 PM Flag
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it would have to hurt for them to loose his gift for the development people (fundraisers) to reach out to the admissions folks in a serious way. It might be a tie breaker but I doubt there are a lot of ties. I bet you could do something more creative with that money that would be a better tie breaker. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:39 PM Flag
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you don't even know how to spell...why would anyone trust your opinion? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:45 PM Flag
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That loose/lose thing is so often the sign of a gifted mind. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 02:47 PM Flag
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dh and I contribute to our alma mater (Princeton) every year -- although it won't make or break admissions decisions (unless you give a ton, which we can't do), they do look at it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 03:41 PM Flag
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As cold-blooded as this sounds, it's not a completely insane idea. There's a book out there by a former admissions officer that discusses this and it basically says that there are two categories of legacies that get a little more of a look than the typical legacy - people who contribute a lot of $$$ and people who have been loyal supporters for a very long time and also active in other ways. So apparently, schools do at least look at length of support, not just amount. Having said that, this provides only a slight edge, and I wouldn't be ordering any Yale parent sweatshirts now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 05:23 PM Flag
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Yeah but what category does having a building named after your great-grandfather go under? And add 3rd generation legacy... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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If he wants to influence admissions decisions, you will have to donate a lot of money. If you can afford to build a new art studio or science lab, go for it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 05:34 PM Flag
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Poster...you make me sick. Pull the stick out of your ass and worry about things that matter. Newly pregnant and your big concern is getting into Yale? Get a life, your poor child will never have a shot at anything if you continue to worry about how you'll pay off everyone to get your kid in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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yikes you are nasty. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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Outburst! Blue Collar Rage! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:00 PM Flag
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I couldn't agree more. It's not blue collar rage, it's common sense in the face of upper middle class idiocy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:27 PM Flag
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The only thing I was worried about when I was newly pregnant was that my baby would be healthy.I couldn't think past the next OB visit. But then again, I don't make a million bucks, so I guess the thought of worrying about college never entered my mind. In my world I prayed for a smart kid with work ethic! What a variety of people we are here at UB. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 05:58 PM Flag
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thank you for that deep thought. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:22 PM Flag
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And you will (hopefully) raise a child as sensible and grounded as yourself...unlike some 'round here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:28 PM Flag
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Only if he's contributing at least six figures on a regular basis for the next 15 years or funding some major project it won't matter much if your kid is not otherwise qualified to be admitted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:46 PM Flag
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What about the building named for soon-to-be-dc's great-grandfather? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.24.08, 06:59 PM Flag
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former college admissions person here (seven sisters school)....the contribution won't help (unless it is really a doozy) but the legacy status might a little bit -- but only if the kid is on the margins...for example, it might get him a wait-list if otherwise a rejection....or could move from wait-list to accept....but the kid must have the qualifications for admission him/herself...in my experience it was really really rare for legacy status or contributions to make a difference in the admissions decision [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 06.25.08, 10:29 AM Flag
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