UrbanBaby

06.23.08, 19:24 PM General Topics
12 replies

8yo DD often says things like "I wish I didn't exist" and "I'm no good at anything" and "I wish I weren't me", etc. She's extremely smart but doesn't have many friends. She's also extremely dramatic and sensitive. Time for therapist? She's only 8!!! How can she be saying stuff like this??? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.23.08, 07:24 PM Flag

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definitely time for a therapist. I hate to ask, is there any way someone in her life is abusing her and you don't know it? Most kids wouldn't come up with this on their own at that age. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:33 PM Flag

OP: abusing her in what way? I would say slim to none chance and I'm very keen to that sort of thing, having had issues in my childhood. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:44 PM Flag

I'm not sure, but I really don't think that a kid would say this stuff without being told it. It wouldn't have to be sexual abuse, but I know many abusers say this type of thing so that the kid feels like it is her fault. I really don't want to alarm you, it's just that many parents miss this key sign, mine sure did (I too had childhood issues with this). [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:52 PM Flag

OP: She's always been super verbal and bizarrely philosophical. That she came up with this stuff without being told it doesn't worry me -- though it's possible she's read something like this in a book -- it's that she's having these thoughts organically. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:55 PM Flag

^^^ I'm about to log off, good luck to you! Abuse is certainly not the only answer, and I am very glad that you are taking your daughter's comments seriously. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:56 PM Flag

I'm 100% sure she's reacting to her status as school. As parents, we think we make the biggest difference but it's not true--it's her peers. She needs SOCIAL therapy asap. I'm not saying there's a single thing wrong with her but SHE thinks there is and needs to feel empowered to change. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.24.08, 05:23 AM Flag

I don't think this is odd at all for this age. We've certainly gone through it. Small amount of attention given but I never belittle her feelings. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.24.08, 05:18 AM Flag

poor dear. it does sound like she needs to talk to someone. not being cheeky, but acting or writing may be something she'd like if she's dramatic and sensitive and needs an outlet? good luck. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:51 PM Flag

I don't agree that abuse is the cause. My 6 yo says similar things when he feels remorseful. He is in therapy (no abuse history) and the psychiatrist attributes it partly to his not having a "theory of mind" which can be part of a social learning disability or autistic spectrum disorder. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 07:59 PM Flag

My DS said similar things at the same age. Very alarming, for sure. I was in therapy, so I talked it through w/ my therapist. We tried a lot of positive reinforcement, spoke privately w/ his teachers, and just tried to be aware of it as much as possible. He is also extremely dramatic and sensitive, too. I considered therapy, and would definitely have taken him if it hadn't resolved over the last couple of years. Good luck. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 08:10 PM Flag

Have you asked DD about school? DS said similar things when he was being bullied at school by Queen Bee and wannabees. He is also sensitive. Talked to teacher - she kept an eye on things and the situation improved. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.23.08, 08:38 PM Flag

At this point, I think its just time or mommy to let her share her feelings and ask couple of calm open ended questions. Good luck. [ Reply | More

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General Topics 06.24.08, 05:02 AM Flag