UrbanBaby

06.23.08, 08:19 AM General Topics
12 replies

I love my MIL but she is constantly giving me advice from when she had her kids (they are now 35 and 40). She'll say things like, I was walking around the neighborhood days after being let out of the hospital (while forgetting she was in the hospital for almost two weeks, not the two days we are) or, I mixed in formula right away (while forgetting that formula was "the thing" in the 70s and not recommended as wholeheartedly these days). How do I deal with this. She is trying to be helpful and while most things about babies haven't changed in 40 years, a lot have! [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:19 AM Flag

Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

I would nod and ask more questions about what it was like for her. Sounds like she's just trying to connect - and many women don't have the opportunity to talk about their experiences with others. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:21 AM Flag

hahaha... I'm pregnant, no other dcs yet, but she's already starting on the advise. Right down to the fact that I don't climb stairs the right way for a pregnant woman, I absolutely need to hold a railing at all times. I excuse her though b/c she was a nun from age 18-28, so some of her social skills are a bit lacking. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:25 AM Flag

Just smile & do it the way you want too [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:27 AM Flag

or: of course... but the advice is so ridiculous that sometimes it is hard to do with a straight face. For my mil, part of the problem is that she only had dss, so she has not dd to do this with. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:29 AM Flag

Just let her have her thoughts- all you have to do is listen. You don't have to agree. This is probably her way of relating to you & she is using her experience to do it- pretty normal. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:26 AM Flag

OP - I know, she just phrases everything in a way like, why wouldn't you do it the exact same way I did? I expect it will only get worse when db is old enough for school. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:33 AM Flag

Well, if it bothers you, say something. Why worry about how bad you think its going to get? [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:39 AM Flag

sometimes you have to be a little firm with her, if it's driving you nuts. Not mean or anything, but I really wish people would think about their suggestions first, and see if they really are all that important. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:39 AM Flag

my mil suggested i let dd fall asleep w/ bottle in mouth until i said it contributes to ear infections. she stopped making suggestions pretty quickly. her boys were constantly at doctor's w/ear infections. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:36 AM Flag

hehe... does it really? I thought that you didn't do that because it was bad for the teeth. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:37 AM Flag

yeah it does, unswallowed liquid pools in back of throat and ear tubes. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:43 AM Flag

Just nod your head. FWIW, I was up and walking around the day I came home - that is more the particular person than anything else. [ Reply | More

]
General Topics 06.23.08, 08:39 AM Flag