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06.22.08, 19:54 PM NY Schools
48 replies
Nervous about end of year party at pre-K because ds will be going to Anderson. Feel like the other parents will think we're bragging, but it's just a fact. We were incredibly lucky to get a spot, and of course, ds was on his game the day of the test. How have/will you deal with the school disclosure issue? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
NY Schools 06.22.08, 07:54 PM Flag
 

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You're not bragging if people ask you. And trust me, not everyone cares about where your kid is going to school. Some of us only care about our own kids. Promise! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:55 PM Flag
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OP: of course, but people probably will ask as everyone wants to know if the kids will be together. I won't volunteer unless they do. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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Just be humble and no one can accuse you of bragging. And congrats. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:58 PM Flag
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Thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:59 PM Flag
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Oh please. Just say, "He's going to Anderson--we got really lucky." and leave it at that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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You don't even have to add the luck part. I am honestly embarrassed for this OP [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:01 PM Flag
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I think it's nice to acknowledge the randomness of it, but that's me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:02 PM Flag
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np: I've been just saying that he's going to A. If anyone seems to care or ask any other questions, I do say dd got lucky, because it was a lottery and I think it's a wonderful school, so I do feel lucky. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:08 PM Flag
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op: why are you embarassed for me? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:04 PM Flag
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What? Why would they think you're bragging, unless you're the one bringing it up in a totally unrelated conversation? Surely people are aware of the whole G&T issue? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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I guess they are, but not sure how many others applied. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:59 PM Flag
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Just a tip: assume everyone is just as on top of school admissions as you are. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:00 PM Flag
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okey-doke [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:00 PM Flag
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You'll fit right in at Anderson. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:58 PM Flag
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Seriously. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:59 PM Flag
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lol! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:01 PM Flag
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how so? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:00 PM Flag
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NP: You're already so self-involved that you're "worrying" about this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:01 PM Flag
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op: oh, really didn't realize that made me self-involved. I jsut want to get along with people. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:03 PM Flag
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If you really want to get along, then you should already know folks since the school year is ending. Is your son's school life really that much of a mystery to you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:05 PM Flag
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no, but I haven't seem most of the parents in months due to my work schedule. I'm not that on top of what people are doing about next year. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:06 PM Flag
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If you're friends with them, you've had this conversation with them already. If you haven't, then does it really matter what a bunch of people you'll never see again think? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:07 PM Flag
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good point. I should stop worrying about it. Thanks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:09 PM Flag
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It will be full of falsely modest type A moms who only care about their child. It's a swamp. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:02 PM Flag
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oh come off it, you just can't wait to be asked where DC is going to school. And let me tell you, [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:05 PM Flag
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op: honestly, I'm very proud of my dc, but this does make me feel uncomfortable. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:07 PM Flag
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Get over yourself. Seriously. Are they going to egg your DC at the party? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:08 PM Flag
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op: lol. Of course not. I'm just socially awkward in general. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:10 PM Flag
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Apparently so. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:11 PM Flag
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:P [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:16 PM Flag
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^^ Anderson is a fine school, but it isn't all that... the parents I know there IRL are happyish, but not thrilled (they are normal people, unlike those here on UB). Some years are great, some suck, depends on the teacher you get in any given year, just like anywhere else. (Signed gave up A for another highly regarded public which also isn't perfect, but pretty great and closer to our home). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:08 PM Flag
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This is like the people who won't say they went to HArward or Yale because they think it's bragging. They say they went to a little school in Cambridge (or Conn.), which is more obnoxious than just stating your school and not thinking anything of it. Just say the school like you're saying any other local school. Your kid is smart, but not any smarter than hundreds of other kids who also scored a 99 (or many of those who scored lower on that stupid test or didn't take it at all). Signed fellow future A mom. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:05 PM Flag
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op: I completely agree that he's no smarter than other kids going there, and there are also some really smart kids in his class. I think I'm more worried about how they did, and if it will be awkward. For instance, there's a really smart boy who I don't think scored into G&T at all, and I feel bad about it, becaue I think he's smarter than my dc in many ways. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:09 PM Flag
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His mom will really appreciate your pity. Get over yourself. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:10 PM Flag
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op: okay, I give up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:11 PM Flag
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Reread your post and say none of that at the party. It's unbelievable condescending and if you don't see why it's condescending, then maybe you should speak as little as possible at the party. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:11 PM Flag
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okay, I reread it, and don't get the condescending part. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:12 PM Flag
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You are such a together and on top of it parent that you feel badly for the kids whose parents didn't appropriately advocate for their kids. Get it now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:13 PM Flag
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that's not at all what I meant. I meant that although the other kid is really, really smart, he didn't do well on the OLSAT for whatever reason, and I feel like it's kind of unfair that he didn't get in. His parents advocated for him perfectly well. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:15 PM Flag
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So just say the truth: this was a totally weird year and your DC totally lucked out, or at least you hope that's true because there's no way to know if A is the right school for your kid. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:13 PM Flag
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op: which is totally true. Thanks for not flaming me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:15 PM Flag
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truthfully I was tempted to flame, but I restrained myself :) Surely you must see why? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:23 PM Flag
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not really, but I guess I should based on the replies. Just nervous. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:41 PM Flag
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lol- good luck with that - i am a hunter parent and frequently get that "you poor thing, couldn't swing private" look [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:51 PM Flag
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how about being normal - answer if asked - go ahead and ask if it would be normal to ask in the context of the conversation - and if you are dying to ask someone where dc goes to school for no good reason ask yourself why you care or why it matters - are you just trying to be asked yourself? have you nothing else interesting to offer? can you not talk about your kid without mentioning the school? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 08:56 PM Flag
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op: ugh. I really don't get why this post spiralled out of control. I feel really misunderstood. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 09:00 PM Flag
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I think people are being a little harsh here. Some people will probably feel a stab of jealousy on behalf of their children (particularly if the immediate choice isn't very good), but that's normal too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:20 AM Flag
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^^actually, I think the harsh reaction here shows you how prickly people can be about this stuff. So, your social instincts are more-or-less on target. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 05:30 AM Flag
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