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06.21.08, 13:32 PM General Topics
42 replies
Who here has actually aborted a pregnancy because of down syndrome? Or some other survivable abnormality? I can't believe how many people are posting they would abort because of down's. That is horrifying. You suck. [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.21.08, 01:32 PM Flag
 

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dude. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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best response ever [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:34 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 05:38 AM Flag
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Would you rather they gave birth to babies that they lack the capacity to raise? Are people lining up to adopt downs babies these days? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:34 PM Flag
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i don't think you know what you have the capacity to raise until faced with it. this is the lamest reason ever. what if your perfectly healthy, normal, G&T perfect little child was diagnosed with leukemia -- would you have the capacity to deal with that? Please. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:38 PM Flag
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There is a HUGE difference between bringing a child into the world knowing that they will need care for the rest of their lives (potentially longer than you will live yourself) and treating a child who gets sick. Huge difference. I aborted a TS baby. When DH had thyroid cancer, I didn't drive him out to the wild and abandon him. Totally different situations. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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It's not different. Not at all. It's about accepting the unknown when you decide to become a parent. There are NO guarantees. With the new ultrasound technology, what else will people start selecting out? bone structure? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:44 PM Flag
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You want to compare bone structure to severe mental retardation and chronic health problems? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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What is your problem? Is it the unknown? In that case, if downs or tay-sachs are diagnosed, they are no longer unknowns. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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according to published reports there are waiting lists for children with down syndrome in the U.S. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.02.08, 05:57 AM Flag
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you're saying you deinitely wouldn't? i'd be very torn. honestly some people are just not up to it, and they realize it and i think that's good. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:34 PM Flag
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maybe to you... i'm not saying that i would or i wouldn't, but for me, a woman should be able to choose whether she wants to have a child or not... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:34 PM Flag
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OP: Yes, I agree 100 percent -- a woman should have the right to choose whether or not to have a baby. Not determine through termination what kind of baby she wants to have. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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i understand the way of looking at this where it seems horrifying. But, life with a downs child/adult is a completely huge difference from life with a non-downs child. and if you don't have the resources or wherewithal to deal with that, that seems better to me to call before the birth than after. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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np: So a woman should not have the right to terminate a pregnancy if the fetus has a terminal genetic disorder? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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are you referring to something like I state below, where there is virtually no chance of survivability after birth, or are you talking about something like Huntington's? CF? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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I am talking terminal conditions. You said that mother's don't have the right to chose what kind of babies they have. But do they have the right to chose to NOT have terminally ill babies? Terminally ill babies that will suffer until they die? Where is the line? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:47 PM Flag
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look below -- i already posted on that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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So why would you say that a woman has no choice to use termination to decide what kind of baby she has? Clearly, you do support women terminating to chose to not have a sick baby. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:49 PM Flag
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And if there was prenatal testing for their conditions, their parents would have every right to chose to terminate to spare their children their suffering. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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are you ok with people aborting for other reasons? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:35 PM Flag
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OP: If a woman for whatever reason cannot have ANY baby at that point in her life, or if the baby is diagnosed in utero with a condition with a very small chance of survival after birth. THis is not the case with down's -- many of whom grow up and live very fulfilling lives, though of course not ivy league material. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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And many babies with downs are plagued with serious bowl problems and face a life of painful surgeries. Others can never care for themselves and end up in group homes when their parents get too old to care for them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:44 PM Flag
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and many "normal" children experience painful surgeries and life-altering accidents and end up in group homes when their parents get too old to care for them. so what? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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And if there were genetic tests for their conditions, their parents would have every [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:50 PM Flag
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OP: It's about the parents' ego and nothing else. Not wanting to have a "different" child, a child that can't match your expectations. Joke's on you though, because one way or another, your child is going to disappoint you anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:47 PM Flag
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You are sick. And clearly, you have never had to figure out how to care for a chronically ill child for 30 plus years. How to make your household finances work when SAH is suddenly your only option because there is no childcare. How to balance caring for elderly parents and a child who needs all of your energy and attention, all of the time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 01:55 PM Flag
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np: Do you have a child with Down's Syndrome or another chromosomal abnormality? Because unless you've been there - and for 30+ years like in my family - you don't know the extent of what it takes. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 02:50 PM Flag
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ITTTTA. My aunt and cousins were saints taking care of severally delayed cousin. She was tall and strong and mentally disturbed and wreaked havoc on all their lives and none of them ever complain, but all three women say they would abort a downs syndrome fetus. I don't judge and I agree. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 04:21 PM Flag
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Okay. When your daughter gets pregnant at 14, you're going to let her have and keep the baby, right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 02:45 PM Flag
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np- honestly, yes. Couldn't imagine advising for abortion. I'd raise it before advising for an abortion. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 04:00 PM Flag
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How noble of you to sacrifice your DD's health and mental well-being for your own personal satisfaction. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:02 AM Flag
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It is a personal choice and a very difficult one. You really don't know until you are in that situation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 03:10 PM Flag
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i didn't have to do this, but i had CVS b/c if there had been a high risk for downs, i would have aborted. i was extremely depressed when i found out i was pg w/ #2 (suicidal, crying, etc), and was back and forth about aborting anyway. if the db would have also had downs, i would have probably not been able to deal at all. (mostly fine now, btw. due in 4 weeks. have still had moments of depression during pregnancy, but dh has been amazingly supportive and patient throughout, and we'll get through this.) anyway, that's my honest answer, take it or leave it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.21.08, 03:49 PM Flag
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Downs Syndrome varies hugely in its effect. If you think it's just mild retardation, then it seems terrible to abort for that. But it can also mean multiple, life-threatening surgeries for heart problems, and pretty severe retardation. My neighbor's son has Downs, and he can barely walk and, at the age of 7, still wears a diaper. Maybe you are up for that kind of care -- and your DH and your other DCs are -- but that's a huge burden. Not to be taken on lightly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:01 AM Flag
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people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, lady. once you start making blanket statements about other people's choices, life is going to screw with you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 06:29 AM Flag
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You are a judgemental prat. Why post your little ragefest? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.22.08, 07:21 PM Flag
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I terminated my first pregnancy last year after the amniocentesis revealed the baby had Klinefelter's syndrome. It was an extremely painful decision based on my and my husband's assessment of our ability to care for a potentially mentally retarded child. We did not think we could handle it. It was extremely painful and devastating, but the right decision for us. I am now pregnant again and we had a CVS, which revealed no chromosomal abnormalities. It was not an easy decision to make, and I am so grateful I had the choice. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.23.08, 02:10 PM Flag
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I am so sorry you went through that, but I would have made the same decision and for the same reasons. Your story is exactly why women need to get out and THINK about their vote this November. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 05:32 PM Flag
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Having a child is mostly a leap of faith and love ... if you cannot love a child who is "less than perfect" both mentally and physically then you have your decision. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 05:27 PM Flag
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I have not but I would. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 05:28 PM Flag
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you post this on a regular basis, don't you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.30.08, 05:31 PM Flag
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