< Return to Talk
06.19.08, 13:40 PM General Topics
6 replies
is not hugging your child when she cries a rejection of her, or a withdrawal of one's love? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.19.08, 01:40 PM Flag
 

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depends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.19.08, 01:43 PM Flag
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you could just as easily ask whether hugging your child when she cries rewards bad behavior. It all depends on context. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.19.08, 01:43 PM Flag
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thank you, thank you , thank you. i don't think crying is really bad behavior but the less emphasis i put on it, the less she cries. i just worry that it is being unkind. have had to ignore it on two occasions when she was in fits of tantrums. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.19.08, 01:45 PM Flag
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It depends. If DC is crying because they are hurt or scared, then yes, it is a rejection. If DC is crying because you will not buy them the breakfast cereal they want or otherwise manipulate you, then no, it's being a parent. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.19.08, 01:44 PM Flag
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but i think that if you hug when they are 'hurt' it actually hurts more. for instance, we were strolling on a bumpy road the other day. the stroller hit a big bump. dd was fine. i said, 'sorry, about that, dd" and she started crying. had i said nothing. she would have been fine. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.19.08, 01:47 PM Flag
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There are the little boo-boo that shouldn't be fussed over and then there is the fall off the top of the monkey bars that really does hurt and needs love and kisses (and an ice bag). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.19.08, 01:53 PM Flag
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