< Return to Talk
06.16.08, 07:02 AM General Topics
33 replies
be honest: what are your first thoughts or assumptions when you hear that someone is in the process of adopting, or meet someone who has adopted? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:02 AM Flag
 

Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

»
Im jealous, I always wanted to adopt [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:02 AM Flag
»
ditto. wish it wasn't so expensive [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:03 AM Flag
»
so do I [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 05:45 PM Flag
»
i'm psyched for them, honestly. and for the kids. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:03 AM Flag
»
op, what are your first thoughts? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:03 AM Flag
»
one thing: i assume they couldn't get pregnant [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:05 AM Flag
»
Not necessarily. I know two families with both bio and adopted kids and they adopted because they wanted to, no problems with conceiving. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:49 AM Flag
»
Personally? That their child is in for a life of problems. All adopted children I know ended up with emotional issues. Sorry. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:05 AM Flag
»
just damn. So do you think it's better for the kid to be aborted or live in an orphanage it's whole life? Some attitude ya got there [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:06 AM Flag
»
Not what I am saying at all. It is just the observation I have made. Of course I think adoption is a wonderful choice, I just see that children end up more troubled than not in adopted homes. They never feel like the really have a place, especially if they are of a different race. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:08 AM Flag
»
i'm a different race - see post below [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:09 AM Flag
»
you are a different race than your parents? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:18 AM Flag
»
That is such a silly generalization. I know at least 5 people that were adopted and they are all successful well adjusted adults. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:51 AM Flag
»
me too [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 07.21.08, 03:49 PM Flag
»
I think that the mess ups that you meet that are adopted stand out much more in your head than the normal adopted kids. I only know a few people that ended up with troubled kids and many more that turned out just fine and truly love their adopted parents. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 05:49 PM Flag
»
I smile and say us too! We have a bio kid, can have another and are in the process of adopting. I realized after we had our ds who is a delight and has looks quite different than either of us that every child is a genetic crapshoot (so to speak) and a blessing and that just made it a lot easier to adopt. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 07.21.08, 03:14 PM Flag
»
As an adoptive mom of a tri-racial child I am so upset by your statement. Studies have shown that children who were adopted are just as well adjusted as children who were born into their families. Even in the best of situations, adoption is experienced as a profound loss for a child but all the literature seems to indicate that if he or she has a loving home with his/her adoptive parents and that the parents deal with the issue of differences (acknowledging very real differences in ethnicity,preparing the child to deal with racism, while promoting a sense of belongingness by stressing what all family members share and enjoy together will result in a well-balanced child. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.26.08, 04:17 PM Flag
»
My dh who was adopted would agree with you [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.26.08, 04:20 PM Flag
»
aw, i'm sorry you feel this way. i posted below and i am adopted. i've had a very normal life and couldn't wish for a closer relationship than i have with my parents. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:08 AM Flag
»
Well, I know lots of biological children with emotional issues too. So what? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:25 AM Flag
»
how many adopted children do you know? that's a really broad and mostly untrue generalization. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:46 AM Flag
»
Yeah, that child would have been so much better to grow up in a orphanage or state facility. I get it. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:50 AM Flag
»
first assumption, right or wrong, is that they were unable to conceive on their own. i know could be a choice to adopt, but you asked what first assumption is. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:05 AM Flag
»
i think "cool" and then, upon reflection, wonder if they were or were not able/interested in having a biological child. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:05 AM Flag
»
as someone who is adopted, i am excited as i would love to adopt eventually. i think it's great. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:07 AM Flag
»
yeah, i assume that they can't conceive, or if they're gay maybe they don't want to conceive with a non- partner. though i also know several people who have several kids of their own, can conceive, but adopted from a third-world country becaus ethey believe in it [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:08 AM Flag
»
This is not an answer to your question, but I do have a friend that is adopting her 2nd, after having a biological first, b/c she had a horrible pregnancy and wants another child. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:08 AM Flag
»
ditto, i know people like this too [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 07:11 AM Flag
»
I am one of those people who you are asking about. I have 2 biological children and we're in the process of adopting internationally. We're doing it because we'd like a 3rd and we believe this is right for our family. We don't feel we need another biological child. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 05:45 PM Flag
»
I think this is wonderful of you [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 05:47 PM Flag
»
np: I just read a quote from Angelina saying something to the effect that people think this is some humanitarian choice and it's not - it's our blessing. That's how I feel if we are lucky enough to find our 3rd child. [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.16.08, 05:51 PM Flag
»
not trying to be snarky, just curious -- if it's not a humanitarian choice, and it's a blessing, why not just make your own blessing by having a bio child? if you don't have infertility issues, it seems easier and cheaper to just make your own 3rd than to go through the trials of the adoption process. what's your motivation to do it? [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 06.26.08, 04:32 PM Flag
»
we might do this too. we only have one bio (by choice), and are looking into adopting a 2nd. we might adopt domestically tho, not sure yet [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 07.21.08, 03:52 PM Flag
Refresh » New Post »
Select Category
close [X]

close [X]

Select a Category (only 1)

category
Stages
Regions