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06.15.08, 19:44 PM Newborn
21 replies
My 2.5 yo is freaking out bcse of newborn and my not being able to move around bcse of c-section. I'm feeling so guilty I can barely take it. I spent 2.5 years with him trying to make him feel secure and loved. He was so happy and now I feel that he's really upset and much needier. Anyone feel the same way? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
Newborn 06.15.08, 07:44 PM Flag
 

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You sort of shot yourself in the foot on this one. Making sure he feels secure and happy? Isn't that a normal kid thing if the household is normal? You should be able to comfortably introduce new family members without upheaval [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:47 PM Flag
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np: Oh, give me a break. OP - it's a big transition, and it can be tough at that age because they are still so young and not very verbal yet. Give it some time, try to have some private time with him each day (even if it's just a snuggle in bed). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:48 PM Flag
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I'm not sure what you mean. All I meant is that he was a totally well adjusted child who played independently and was really happy most of the time and calm. Many people commented on it. Now he's much more agitated. Are you saying that there isn't ever a transition when the next child is born? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:49 PM Flag
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Oh I thought you meant you were totally worried everyday about his happiness and well being. Before you think I'm nuts, my SIL is literally obsessed with whether her child is happy, to the point of sitting in on her second grade class. I'm sure he's fine and just adjusting to a new sib. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:52 PM Flag
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why can you not move around? I had 2 C's and was back to normal after 2 weeks. Bend down to #1 instead of picking him up [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:49 PM Flag
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It's day 11 and I had a weird pain in my leg that hindered my progress. But for the first week I could barely move. I guess not everyone's experience is exactly the same. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:51 PM Flag
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op: not everyone's experience is the same. my recovery was very difficult with only 1DB. i couldn't even sleep b/c it hurt to lay down. couldn't imagine if i had a toddler as well. don't have any experience advice since i have only 1 DB but i'm sure this is normal. if it were me i'd probably stress that mommy had to get an operation and is recovering. maybe DH can get involved in getting DS to 'help' mommy recover. might make him feel involved and special. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.16.08, 09:30 AM Flag
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this. geez. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 01.14.15, 04:50 PM Flag
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back normal in 2 weeks? hm [ Reply | More
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General Topics 01.14.15, 04:51 PM Flag
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I actually didn't see this until db was 6-7 mos old and had more personality and could grab things, etc! This kind of thing is pretty normal. In a few months, read "Siblings without Rivalry." [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:50 PM Flag
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I think that he was really upset that I was in the hospital for 5 days when we hadn't really been apart before that. Then I came home and was very slow because of the c-section so I think that's also really effected him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:53 PM Flag
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that is a big deal for a child that young. did he come and visit you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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go easy on yourself. your 2.5 year old will deal. everyone does. do not baby him or give in too much or he'll start manipulating the hell out of you. everyone has to learn at some point the world does not revolve around one person. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:50 PM Flag
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Older child needs to transition and learn to share. New child will never know what it is to have 2.5 years of your undivided attention. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:54 PM Flag
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Both things make me feel guilty actually. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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You need to get a handle on the situation. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:57 PM Flag
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2 1/2 is a boy and newborn is a girl? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:55 PM Flag
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Both are boys. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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They could be best friends. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 07:59 PM Flag
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i felt the same, only #1 was 4. Cried my eyes out a few times when she was waiting for me to put her to bed but by the time the baby was asleep, she had fallen asleep alone. That said, the baby is now 2 and they love each other a lot. I think what helps the most is to remember the almost everyone on the planet had the experience your first child is having, and survived. And I think first kids are more messed up not because of the second coming alon, but because of all the over mothering we give them before #2. That said, I still miss my total connection with #1, and they still fight over me at bedtime. gl [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 08:01 PM Flag
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haven't btdt yet, but from friends, I hear this is is totally normal in every way. it'll get easier on all. congrats on the baby and good luck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 08:10 PM Flag
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