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06.15.08, 17:19 PM General Topics
25 replies
Sunday night and we've just had our usual fight about why DH can't do anything around the house. SAHM or p/t moms...what is the division of labor? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
General Topics 06.15.08, 05:19 PM Flag
 

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ft WOHM and I do pretty much everything. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:24 PM Flag
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no cleaning or childcare help? On weekends you do childcare/errands/cleaning/cooking while DH relaxes? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:26 PM Flag
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We both play with ds but I dress him, put him to bed, etc. If I ask DH to bathe or change him, he will but I have to ask. He doens't clean anything. If cooking occurs, I do it and then I do the dishes and the next day I put them away. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:28 PM Flag
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^^I have cleaning help every week. But of the tasks that remain to be done, I am the one doing the lion's share. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:29 PM Flag
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you find this reasonable? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:32 PM Flag
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No I don't. But otherwise nothing gets done. Sucks. From time to time I blow up and things get temporarily better and then we slowly lapse back into the old pattern. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:34 PM Flag
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I hope you are sticking at 1 kid then [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:35 PM Flag
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Interesting leap to make there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:37 PM Flag
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Spoken like a true mom of a...lets see....11 month old? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:40 PM Flag
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np: That's pretty much it, yes. Sometimes DH will take dc to a party or playdate so I can get some work done. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:28 PM Flag
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Ditto. Except I have a housekeeper come every two weeks to do the heavy cleaning/scrubbing. I just lightly clean. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:27 PM Flag
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sahm, and I do pretty much everything house related, though he will unload the dishwasher. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:25 PM Flag
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if asked or unprompted? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:27 PM Flag
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both. he'll take out the garbage too, but never remembers the days, so I will ask him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:28 PM Flag
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I feel like my dh does a lot, esp if you factor in finances, dealing with our annoying accountant, etc. He also throws me out of the house every so often so that I can have time with friends or myself. Would love to figure out what the real division is (I WOHM) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:27 PM Flag
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^^we also outsource the stuff we don't like to do, like cleaning and laundry [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:28 PM Flag
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Yeah, but even when you have someone come during the week to clean and do laundry there is still lots of work to do on the weekends and after work. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:30 PM Flag
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I guess it doesn't seem like that much, or my dh is taking a lot of it - I still buy the presents for the family, do the grocery shopping and schedule ped appts though [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:39 PM Flag
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I do most everything, but he is great with the kids--will put them to bed, bath, etc. if he's home at that time, which he usually is not. I do everything else. SAHM and WAHM. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:28 PM Flag
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I suggest that you schedule in some time where you are "busy" and he needs to be with kids. It doesn't sound like that is going to happen organically for you, but that it what you want. Schedule it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:29 PM Flag
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yes, good idea [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:30 PM Flag
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i sahm. he has his specific chores, garbage, changing water bottle, if he is home, we put kids to bed and bathe them together, if we have dinner together, we clear table together, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:32 PM Flag
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I am a WOHM and the division is about 80/20. We argue about it too [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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SAHM - I do most, but he helps a decent amount. He walks the dog in the morning and at night (I do the midday walk) and takes out the garbage/recycling. I do the day-to-day bill-paying/accounting, he does the investing. I do all the laundry, grocery shopping, and cooking/dishes; housekeeper once a week to do the heavy cleaning. If he is home early enough, he supervises DCs shower (making sure all the shampoo is out and there is actually soap on the washcloth) and does stories/bedtime, otherwise I do it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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1. Get a housekeeper; 2. Freshdirect; 3. Send laundry out. Now you can fight about things like he doesn't bring you flowers. When I got married, I told my dh that I wasn't going to clean and that we had to get a housekeeper. I buy all food on freshdirect from a preapproved list that I keep buying over and over and my DH brings the laundry to be done. Most men won't do anything unless they have to. Sad but true b/c this is how 99 percent were raised. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.15.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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