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06.10.08, 12:50 PM New York City
86 replies
My friend routinely has her 4 yo dd play in public sprinklers, on the beach, etc. wearing only the bottom of a two-piece. She thinks the top is unnecessary and ridiculous for a 4 yo. What are your thoughts? [ Reply | Watch | Flag ]
New York City 06.10.08, 12:50 PM Flag
 

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My DDs wear a top but not because it is necessary. Because they want to wear it. At that age it sure is optional. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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at 4 yo??? um, no. they know about modesty and private parts by this age. or should know! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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good grief [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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Um, what does modesty have to do w/ a 4 YO torso? Freak. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:55 PM Flag
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that is not my experience. The 4yos I know couldn't care less if they run around naked in public. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:56 PM Flag
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well you must know lots of WT [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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what is WT? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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you're an ass [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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you must be WT [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:00 PM Flag
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ita [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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then you'd freak at my dd. she liked to "air dry" after her evening shower and would lounge around totally nude. she did that until she was about 10 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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gross. could everyone see her in your trailer? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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bite me. did you start this thread just so you could pull this shit [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:00 PM Flag
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no, did you start to to brag about being a pig and teaching your kid to be one too? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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being naked does not mean the child is a pig. You have issues. I'm all for modesty, but give me a break with your nasty class hatred. It's more about you that you think like that. I bet you're not far from WT yourself if you think it's such a big deal [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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if the child is 4 yo and doesn't know enough to cover herself in public then she is being raised to be a pig. sorry. but true. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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exactly why should she cover her chest? it is visually identical to a 4 y.o. boy's chest. in fact,if i put my daughter in a boy's bathing suit, you couldnt' be sure what you were seeing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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You're a pathetic ass teaching kids to have a warped sense of their bodies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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pig mom? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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or: no, anti pig mom. commenting on how warped pig mom's kid will be. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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no you are the pig mom if you are pro-naked little girls in public [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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np. Naked? She's not naked, she just doesn't have a top on. Which is fine, since SHE'S FOUR, you stupid freak. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 02:47 PM Flag
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your anger is so disturbing. Girl's bodies aren't evil, it is people like you who think that women's bodies are shameful and disgusting that are the problem. And I am very modest, and so is my daughter. I just don't accept calling people pigs just because you see their bodies. You are nasty. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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ITTTA. She is acting like the pig. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:13 PM Flag
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Agreed. Probably has loads of skeletons in her closet, enjoys kiddie porn and suffers from grave self-loathing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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you ppl sound like the freaks to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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it's so not about being evil, shameful, etc. it's about teaching your dd to protect and respect her own body. if you don't then yes you are a pig! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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np: You are so sadly misguided. Raising a very insecure little girl, no doubt. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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hardly. good luck raising a pig though! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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There are lots of self-loathing, damaged people out there and misery loves company, so this is just another carrot to dangle in front of possible sources of engagement. The very judgment is riddled with inappropriate, sexual inferences; Don't engage. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 03.25.09, 08:20 AM Flag
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Wow, you are self-hating b..tch for sure! I feel sorry for your husband, kids and anyone around you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 02:54 PM Flag
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op here: I'm not the one calling people WT [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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ignore the troll [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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what the hell is WT? White Trash? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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^^^yes [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:10 PM Flag
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This wacko would be humerous if she weren't messing up her children with her ideas and freak-show mentality about nudity... i feel sorry for her. Being nude as a child is one of the great things about childhood ! her kids - sadly - are screwed ! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:32 PM Flag
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I know. I remember visiting my cousins during the summer in New Orleans when I was 9, and I was thrilled that my aunt let me run around without a shirt because it was so hot! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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You lose that sense of freedom soon enough. Why deny it to kids who don't yet have hang-ups ? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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I think your friend is WT [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:51 PM Flag
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I think sun protection is very, very important at that age and she should be wearing a SPF top (as should DSs). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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I have a ds and I always put a tshirt on him for that reason. ITA about sun protection. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:55 PM Flag
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so put on sunscreen. unless her top has long sleeves you need it anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:58 PM Flag
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do both - tons of sunscreen and shirts on. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:04 PM Flag
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I agree w/her but everyone is so puritanical here I'm sure it makes people nuts. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:52 PM Flag
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it's fine [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:54 PM Flag
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my 3.5 y.o. does this, so i don't have a problem with it. at some point it has to change, but anolder kid will understnad social norms better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:55 PM Flag
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aren't you worried about some pedophile ogling her or taking pics of her? They often loiter outside of playgrounds for this reason. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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no. it may happen, but i canm [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:00 PM Flag
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^^ oops but i can't live my life that way. soem pedophile woudl be turned on by her in a bikini top as well, or dressed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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no they don't [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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Well-- my 4 year old looked like a 6 year old (when she was that age) so NO WAY would I have done that. I guess it depends what the DD looks like. Chubby and babyish? Maybe they can get away with it or if they look more like a 3 year old. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:57 PM Flag
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why is 6 any different? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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The kid should start covering up when she feels that she has to. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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I agree with her and wouldn't care if I saw this except I'd worry about sun exposure [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 12:59 PM Flag
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You need to learn modesty, like anything else. She may not want to wear a top as much when she's older. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:01 PM Flag
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BS. Modesty comes when they become aware that their bodies are changing [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:02 PM Flag
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and the standards of the people around them, too. I'm not against nudity, but it is partly social [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:04 PM Flag
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no it comes when they are taught about what parts are private and what parts are not [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:08 PM Flag
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no that is called shaming. a child can understand about private parts and not touching and such and still not care about running around in a sprinkler with her top off [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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some kids learn that parts of their bodies are private without it being a shameful thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:13 PM Flag
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I sure hope so. I wasn't suggesting the two were mutually exclusive. I just think that a 4yo can understand about private parts and still want to run around in the sprinkler topless [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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ita, the modesty about wearing a shirt will probably kick in later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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no a child cannot understand that and still want to run naked in front of strangers [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:16 PM Flag
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my older child has a sense of waht are private areas. he also likes to ruin around our house naked, even when we have guests (no, we don't let him). its two different things [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:19 PM Flag
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then he hears what you are saying but he doesn't UNDERSTAND it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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eh, so what? The puritanism in this country is way over the top anyway. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:08 PM Flag
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but there are some girls who will end up on the Girls Gone Wild tapes, and some who will not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:10 PM Flag
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and I'd put my money on those that do were brought up in a repressive household, where they were taught their bodies were nasty and shameful. Otherwise, what's the thrill in showing your tits. Girls that are not ashamed of their bodies are not the ones flashing. I'd put money on it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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ita, there is a certain rebellion in some of the girls who are flashing like that, and then there are probably also girls who just grew up to tolerate a lot of nudity and they don't think it is a big deal. I think you can teach privacy and modesty without telling them that nudity or their bodies are bad. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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I am not sure where in the thread anyone ever said to teach that??? I said to teach them that private parts are not for public touching or viewing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:20 PM Flag
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well if you are the one saying that the little girl is learning to be a pig, do you mean that in a nice way? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:21 PM Flag
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Agreed. People are confusing nudity and porn; they are totally different and have no connection. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 03.25.09, 07:54 AM Flag
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Are you crazy - are you saying a 4 yr old has boobs!? What exactly is "private" about a toddler's torso? Maybe if your dd is obese & has boobs already she needs support but otherwise.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 06:11 PM Flag
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Our thoughts don't matter. your friend thinks it's ok and her daughter feels comfortable. It's a personal decision at this point and remains one until puberty. I suspect your friend's dd will want a top long before that. Now what can we do about fat, saggy men and women wearing teeny swimsuits? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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don't forget guys with hairy shoulders in tank tops. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 01:27 PM Flag
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Based on your OP and everything else you've posted in this thread, I think you're Psycho Troll Mom. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 02:46 PM Flag
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More power to her. They don't think twice about this is Europe & neither do I [ Reply | More
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General Topics 06.10.08, 06:12 PM Flag
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Agreed. A top on a little girl looks so silly and what purpose does it serve? My dc's were usually naked at 4 yo, so yours seems a bit overdressed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 03.25.09, 07:48 AM Flag
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this post is 9 months old. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 03.25.09, 07:56 AM Flag
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This comes up every Spring. I think little bikini tops are far more sexualizing of a young child's body than being 'topless'. Our children went topless to 5 y/o at US beaches and played in sprinklers, urban pools and playgrounds in one-piece swimsuits or bottoms with t-shirts. Our building has a pool and they often swam in only bottoms until 6 or 7 yrs old, when they understood that their bodies made OTHER people uncomfortable. We don't mince words in our family. Our kids are pretty clear that people have different views and comfort levels, based on social, religious and cultural differences.Sharing close quarters in an urban environment is a balancing act with a lot to juggle. If you've got enough energy and time to sit around judging people that don't cause you any harm, maybe you could use it for a more constructive pursuits. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 03.25.09, 08:16 AM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.15.09, 08:52 AM Flag
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You just had to do this, right? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.15.09, 09:17 AM Flag
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you know what, you are totally right...whenever i see a girl that age in a 2-piece it looks creepy, like they're trying to look older...bottoms w/ no top, on the other hand, just looks like a little kid running free & having fun [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.15.09, 09:29 AM Flag
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i wouldn't give it any thought. my very conservative and modest immigrant mom never put a top on me until i wanted one - so i was maybe 7 or 8. i did not grow up to go topless on girls gone wild, nor did i wear next to nothing in my teens and 20s when going out. one has nothing to do with the other. nudity in kids is no big deal. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 03.25.09, 08:02 AM Flag
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considering that it's basically only this puritanical nation where fully grown women feel they have to wear tops on the beach, i find it beyond silly to obligate a 4 yo. to do so [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.15.09, 09:25 AM Flag
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Good idea. It is silly for little girls to wear tops. I didn't and neither did my dd. It is much more natural for them and it doesn't draw attention to the differences between little girls and little boys. Besides, the kids never care; it is only parens that seem to have a problem. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 10.15.09, 11:15 AM Flag
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