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Dear UrbanBaby community,

Thank you so much for being a valued member of the UrbanBaby community. We wanted to inform you that we are shutting down the site on July 6th. We are grateful for your participation and support that has helped make UrbanBaby such an important resource to parents for many years.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can email us at urbanbaby-support@cbsinteractive.com.

Thanks so much,

UrbanBaby Support

[ - ] any good restuarants in NYC that are good to bring our 3mo. my DH and I have no babysitter this weekend and we want to eat, below 34th st preferably. thx! 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:11 PM Flag
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artisinal [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:13 PM Flag
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You can bring a 3mo to almost any restaurant, as long as you step out if the db starts crying [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:18 PM Flag
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but the host/hostess give us such a bad look! we always go early but they just hate strollers [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:21 PM Flag
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3mo old can be in the bucket,...there is no need to bring a stoller to the table with a 3 mo. Wait, let me guess,...you want to bring a bug with the bassinet into the restaurant? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:24 PM Flag
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i do but we dont have too. what is a bucket? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:54 PM Flag
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ah, well, it helps to go to a place with a little space. And I wouldn't worry about the hostess giving you a bad look. Friend and I walked into a restaurant once with our 2 3yos and her infant, and the guy seating us looked horrified, as did the three other people in the restaurant. The kids, miraculously, were great, and one couple even stopped by to tell us that. Again, as long as you take the baby out.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:25 PM Flag
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thanx. baby is really good, what is a bucket, a car seat? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:53 PM Flag
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car seat [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 08:01 PM Flag
[ - ] I need to hear how bad other peoples 3.5 yo's are acting and how you are dealing with it?? Please share. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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my 3.5yo became a 4.5yo and is still difficult. no solutions for you. I've tried rewards, threats, sticker charts etc. Occasionally things work but usually they don't. I feel your pain. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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np: how is school? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:27 PM Flag
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I have a 3.3 year old, will I do? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:25 PM Flag
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I think you need to read 1,2,3 Magic. My 3yo was starting to act up a lot and this has given us some tools to fix it and a way to focus on the positives. Also Happiest Toddler, esp the feeding the meter concept. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:26 PM Flag
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My ds had major problems at 3.5. What's going on with you? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:26 PM Flag
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3 1/2 - 4 1/2 has been the roughest time...just starting to see some light. I just try to manage it by giving him choices. Like if he doesn't want to take a bath I ask him if he wants me or dh to give it to him. He still takes bath but feels "empowered" because he gets to choose. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:57 PM Flag
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My 2.5 yo has been a pita for about a year now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.24.08, 04:16 AM Flag
[ - ] want to send dd to mother's day out in the fall but i am really scared about her catching those herpes lip lesions from one of the other kids. am i crazy? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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they don't allow the kids to kiss and hug in most schools and programs these days... and that's a silly reason not to send her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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she is only 2 and i have seen other kids her age put things in their mouths. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:08 PM Flag
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crazy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:08 PM Flag
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what? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:08 PM Flag
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Yes, you are a certifiable loon. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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i don't know what you are talking about (mother's day out in the fall) but your dd is way more likely to get hsv-1 from an adult kissing her than from another child. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:10 PM Flag
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why do you say this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:11 PM Flag
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because that's how it is generally spread. children don't kiss each other very often. you need direct contact. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 08:24 PM Flag
[ - ] Got any advice for me? DD will be 3 in August and is totally NOT interested in potty training at all. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 05.23.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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keep her diaperless when she's home or in panties... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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She is very verbal and asks for a diaper and gets very agitated if I don't put one on her. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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I agree and just keep cleaning up mess until she hates being wet. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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that's what i did with my DS [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:08 PM Flag
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She refuses to go diaperless for long and gets really upset if I resist getting a diaper when she asks for one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:10 PM Flag
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let her get upset [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:17 PM Flag
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really? Is this the best option? I just don't know if it is time to force this issue or not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:20 PM Flag
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Try it for a couple days. If he is getting upset doing it stop and try again in 2 weeks. You might be surprised. That is how it worked for my older ds. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:08 PM Flag
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^^oops sorry thought is said ds [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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mine wasn't either. totally not. she finally trained at 3.6yo in about a day -- that's when she was ready (plus she really wanted the camera I offered up as incentive). though I will say she was at least pooping in the toilet by 3, thank goodness. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:10 PM Flag
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quite buying diapers, tell her they ran out of them, they aren't making them anymore [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:16 PM Flag
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you missed the window, pay the penalty for being lazy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:18 PM Flag
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clearly true. the window was when she was about 21 months and I missed it. thought it would be easier later. obviously wrong. what do I do now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:19 PM Flag
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It is up to her now. Clearly, she is not into it. You need to grin & bear it but also continue to encourage until she is ready. I would liht a candle & pray, consult Oracle, rain dance etc., [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:37 PM Flag
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Happened to me. She actually was 3 when she was potty trained, and she totally did it on her own. One day she decided she wanted panties, and that was it. Never had an accident, never looked back. So, after all the stressing out I did before, I couldn't believe that it was just like that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:42 PM Flag
[ - ] What, are there 3 of us here? Why so sloooww??? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:05 PM Flag
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i think so [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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because everyone left. me included. was all for the new design, but no one is here. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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because everyone is on youbemoms.com [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:19 PM Flag
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why did everyone switch? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:47 PM Flag
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i am here [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:21 PM Flag
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np: it is totally dead, but it has been for weeks now. It's sad. Even with no one here, I still click refresh for three hours at a time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 08:00 PM Flag
[ - ] Are you a green household? We recycle put I don't buy tons of organic and I love Lysol and Clorox bleach. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:03 PM Flag
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I try. I dont have time to go to 3 grocery stores to get all the organic stuff that I would like to. We recycle. I also have a fondness for lysol.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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I replied to this but it wont come up? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:13 PM Flag
[ - ] has anyone been to the airshow at Jones Beach? What is the best time to go, remembering that we have 2 toddlers and an infant in tow? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:03 PM Flag
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what airshow? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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how old are these "toddlers"? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:12 PM Flag
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what air show? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:11 PM Flag
[ - ] any adoptive moms on? 35 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:03 PM Flag
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no -- but my cousin just adopted the most wonderful DD in September... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:04 PM Flag
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domestically? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:04 PM Flag
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yep -- she got a lawyer through another friend who adopted an infant. took my cousin 3.5 wks after all her paperwork was done. for friend, it was 6 months after paperwork... are you looking into it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:05 PM Flag
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yes. my international adoption is going nowhere but i am paralyzed with fear about the possibility of a birthmother changing her mind after i am already down the road with her (or even worse, after the baby is born). in ny state there is a 30 day window. it varies by state. intellectually i completely understand and respect a person's right to change their mind, but i am so afraid of it happening to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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my friend adopted in fla and my cousin adopted in utah but we all live in nj. those two states are very adoptive family friendly. the lawyer who found the babies is in ny -- rockland county -- if you want the number. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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in utah, she had 48 hours to change her mind -- same thing with florida, i think -- or maybe slightly longer. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:10 PM Flag
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np:dh and i were just discussing this over dinner. can you give the # or the name? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:10 PM Flag
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she's in nyack -- there's a $500 consult fee but she's super nice according to friend and cousin -- Laurie Goldheim 845-624-2727, and I have to add that these are two of the most gorgeous babies ever (I'm a little biased, though!) GL [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:14 PM Flag
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somehow, I find this creepy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:17 PM Flag
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what do you find creepy? that adoption attorneys exist or that the info is being shared on UB? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:18 PM Flag
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the chatter about "I have to add that these are two of the most gorgeous babies ever.." is disturbing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:41 PM Flag
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ah, ok. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:49 PM Flag
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why? my cousin did 10 IVFs -- she deserves to be happy and adopt a sweet baby... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:18 PM Flag
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Me. I adopted domestically from Florida. It has been wonderful. I know someone who had the birth mother change her mind, and it was devastating, but she did go on to adopt domestically, and I think the birth mother changing her mind is pretty rare, especially if you work with a good lawyer or agency (they get a good sense of the state of mind of the birth parent). Also, I always wonder what it's like for a birth parent in a foreign adoption who changes her mind but might have no recourse. I'd rather know for sure that the birth mom is certain. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:22 PM Flag
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how did she handle it (the woman who had someone change her mind). was it before or after the baby was born? if after, was it after she had brought her home? did you choose florida because of the laws there or was it just happenstance? tia. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:24 PM Flag
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Florida was happenstance. I live in NY, btw. It was after they flew down to pick up the baby. I didn't know her at the time, but she said it was, of course, really heartbreaking. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:26 PM Flag
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but she pulled it together and did it again. good for her. i don't know if i have it in me, i really don't. although i do understand what you are saying about the certainty and i like having information about and possibly even contact with the birthparent(s) for when my child starts asking questions. how old is your dc? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:33 PM Flag
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He's 5. I never met the birthparents, although I did talk to the birthmom on the phone the day after he was born. I wish I had more info about them, really. It would be very difficult, but as the person says below, people try to get pregnant again after miscarriages, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:36 PM Flag
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^^^it would be very difficult if the birthmom had changed her mind, I mean [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:37 PM Flag
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i know you are right. part of it is that i'm just emotionally exhausted already. i feel like i have to keep proving myself over and over again to become a parent and keep hitting walls everywhere i turn. i actually had an agency rep tell me that their clients who look on their own as well, instead of waiting for their agency to find them a baby are "more ready" to be parents. as if the ability to go out and sell oneself is somehow related to the ability and readiness to parent. it's just demoralizing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:40 PM Flag
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It can be overwhelming. Are you in NY area. My lawyer was Michael Goldstein, (914) 939-1111. His office and staff are really great. He and his wife are adoptive parents and have also just opened an adoption agency. You also might want to contact the Adoptive Parents Committee. They have really great info and support. Good luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:44 PM Flag
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i've heard of him. did he locate the birthmother or did you also use an agency? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:45 PM Flag
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He located the birthmom. I also advertised and did the whole 800 number thing, but ds was from a contact he had. You should really pick just one, an agency or a lawyer.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:47 PM Flag
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i just don't have it in me to do what you did. maybe if i was just starting, but i've been trying to adopt internationally for 2 1/2 years already.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:50 PM Flag
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^^thanks for all your advice, btw. it is much appreciated! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:51 PM Flag
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You're welcome. I'm sorry it's been such an ordeal for you. International is getting really difficult these days, from what I hear. Again, good luck! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:52 PM Flag
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did you use an agency, by the way? or an attorney in florida? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:42 PM Flag
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See above. Private attorney in NY. I also had to pay attorney and agency fees in Florida, unfortunately. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:45 PM Flag
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sorry, missed this. will check out michael goldstein. i am talking to two agencies also...adoption star and adoptions from teh heart. did you consider going with an agency? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:46 PM Flag
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I actually still get e-mails from adoption star. I considered everything in the beginning until I decided to go private. I'm single, and some agencies don't work with single parents. Also, I was open to db of any race, and some agencies don't do that either. In the end, private worked best for me. If you don't care about race, btw, you will be able to adopt quickly. If you want a white baby (everybody has to form the family they are comfortable with, of course), you will also find a db, but how long it takes will depend a little more on luck. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:51 PM Flag
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oh wow, i'm single too. the other main reason i went international. but that is going nowhere now. i just can't believe how hard it is with all the motherless babies in the world. but that's a conversation for another time! thanks again for your help. are you a NYSAC member, by the way? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:53 PM Flag
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No. Never heard of it till I just googled it now! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:56 PM Flag
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glad i could help you with something! it's a good group. has an online email list as well as meetings in nyc. perhaps we'll meet irl one day! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:57 PM Flag
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See you then. ;) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:58 PM Flag
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yes -- the agencies definitely screen the birthmothers thoroughly for this reason. i only know one person who's birthmother backed out -- everyone else did fine. but honestly, it's a leap of faith, like anything. it's horrible to say, but a woman can be 39 wks PG with the perfect pregnancy and deliver a stillborn... it's scary but the end result makes it worth it... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:25 PM Flag
[ - ] Is Riverdale full of dorks? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:03 PM Flag
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my crazy chain smoking MIL is there [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:10 PM Flag
[ - ] What are you reading right now? Me? Confessions of a Wall Street Shoeshine Boy. Also reading Beautiful Boy -- the story of the reporter with the meth addict son. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:02 PM Flag
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brief life of Oscar Wao [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:03 PM Flag
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Caps for Sale [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:04 PM Flag
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I never want to read that book again -- we had to read it over and over again for DS's reading enrichment program -- ugh. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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thirteenth tale. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:07 PM Flag
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ugh, nothing. i have a ton of unread books on my shelf but constantly have stuff going on, and whenI finally get all of 10 minutes to spare, I'm usually catching up on email (and UB). If/when I get to read another book soon, it will probably be something like Unconditional Parenting or How to Talk So Your Children will Listen, though I have a ton of novels and other stuff I'd love to read too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:12 PM Flag
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a book about finances for couples, a book about writing & Beautiful Children [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:14 PM Flag
[ - ] it's funny, 5 years on UB and maybe a total of 15 minutes since the redesign... I keep trying to come back, but it's SO SLOW and lame... posts, not a conversation... I miss it, but am happy for YBM 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:01 PM Flag
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the conversations really are slow. it used to be that it was the server that was the problem. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:02 PM Flag
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ita and i was all for the new design, but if there is no traffic here, i dont know. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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Seriously, are you going to spam all night? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:04 PM Flag
[ - ] this weekend is the anniversary of kicking my lying, cheating ex to the curb. feels great to have that so far behind me! 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:01 PM Flag
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cheers! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:02 PM Flag
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thanks! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:03 PM Flag
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so, what are you going to do to celebrate? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:04 PM Flag
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i should do something to mark the occasion. if i had anything left of his to burn i would do that (no dc's together, btw). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:06 PM Flag
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why not send him some direct mail from the hair club for men? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:11 PM Flag
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alas, he's got a full head of hair. it's his pride and joy. but you've gotten me thinking.... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:13 PM Flag
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then, maybe you should get a voodoo doll and put a bald hex on it!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:15 PM Flag
[ - ] Are you a Blackberry Mom? I wanted to get some sort of texting thing but switched back to a Grandma Phone with big, easy-to-read, easy to touch numbers. I've got to get into this century. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 06:59 PM Flag
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I'm posting from my BB. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:01 PM Flag
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is it hard to read UB on a BB? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:04 PM Flag
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No, you can set the font size. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:06 PM Flag
[ - ] cant log in to YBM. haven't gotten a confirmation email. keep asking it to send again but never get it. any ideas? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 06:57 PM Flag
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try it again. mybe your email is wrong? It's WONDERFUL!!!!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 06:58 PM Flag
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eat some ice cream. check email later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 06:58 PM Flag
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were you able to sign in before or are you a new user? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 06:59 PM Flag
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new user. it's been two days. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:18 PM Flag
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Check your junk folder - mine was there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:20 PM Flag
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nope, nothing there. someone else just posted that theyre having the same problem. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:23 PM Flag
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just give up. Your site isn't doing very well if you have to spam like this. You'll have to call it quits sometime [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:17 PM Flag
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NP: ITA, it is getting rather annoying [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:19 PM Flag
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funny. i thought the other emails were spam, too. but mine is real so maybe the other ones are too. i am saying that i CANT LOG ON. how is this spam? i thought maybe someone from there would read my post and fix the glitch. there's no way to even contact them. and i won't use my regular email adddress because their privacy policy is a bit sketchy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.23.08, 07:20 PM Flag